How to move past it

Discussion in 'General Education' started by Teach200, Nov 29, 2021.

  1. Teach200

    Teach200 Rookie

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    Nov 29, 2021

    How can I move forward after getting written reprimand at work?? I feel horrible for an honest mistake I did weeks ago. I screwed up, owned up to my mistake, went directly to the admin and informed them what happened. I take my teaching job very seriously, and have always been top of my game. But at the same point in time, it's human to err. There is no way I would deliberately do wrong and put my job in jeopardy. I was given a warning letter by the school principal. I accepted and signed it. Ran into her a week later and received the coldest hello from her

    It has been about 4 weeks now... I put on a happy face when I go into school everyday and everything seems to be going fine but I still feel horrible, upset, and just like a failure. I just can't get over it. I don't know what the admin really thinks of me

    Would you just quit or try to gain their trust back
     
    Last edited: Nov 29, 2021
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  3. creativemonster

    creativemonster Cohort

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    Nov 29, 2021

    This sounds like a difficult position to be in (figuratively) You might never know what Admin thinks of you. If you can manage this, don't put any more of your concern into things you can't control - like admin's real thoughts. Focus on what you can (and need to) control - your teaching. In time, if you still are feeling like everything is cold, then take it from there. But honestly, as you are learning to focus where you need to, strong administrators will see that shift. It sounds like you reflected, learned, moved on. No need to discuss what you have learned with admin. They are not your teacher. Sometimes when they are "cold," it might be because they are putting out another fire down the hall, and have already moved on. Good luck! Hang in there. Let us know how things go.
     
  4. Missy

    Missy Aficionado

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    Nov 30, 2021

    Without knowing more about the mistake you made, please remember that you need not self-report this to the principal.
    Also, do you believe it is a mistake that justifies the letter you received? I hope if you have a union that you consulted your rep prior to signing the letter.
    Is this letter really something big enough to resign over?
    Perhaps you could talk with a trusted colleague in your district, and I bet you will hear stories of errors made by other teachers (and administrators) that were never dealt with.
     
  5. Teach200

    Teach200 Rookie

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    Nov 30, 2021

    @creativemonster ,
    I've been trying to focus on teaching ,but all I can say is it's not easy. I can't stop thinking...

    Thank you for the advice. Will keep you posted on how it goes
     
  6. Teach200

    Teach200 Rookie

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    Nov 30, 2021

    @Missy ,
    I do, I do believe that it was a mistake that justified the letter. But I don't believe its something big enough to resign over...I just don't feel comfortable or confident anymore.
    I haven't thought about speaking to anyone at school regarding this matter, only to avoid adding insult to my injury if I found out that others (staff/administrators) probably got away with other (maybe worse) mistakes
     
  7. vickilyn

    vickilyn Multitudinous

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    Dec 2, 2021

    This has obviously been a stressful learning experience. Unless there is a good reason to discuss the matter, I wouldn't - period. I would caution, however, against rationalizing that what you did, honest mistake or not, is not so bad because others "may have" gotten away with similar mistakes or even worse ones. You are not being judged by what others may or may not have done, but only for your own mistake, which you say deserved the letter you signed. I believe that we learn from our mistakes, no matter how stressful the incident may be, so turn your mistake into a learning experience you will never forget, then move forward without looking for signs of mistakes by others. That is the hardest thing to do.
     
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  8. Missy

    Missy Aficionado

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    Dec 4, 2021


    I did not mean to imply that the OP should negate the mistake because others have “gotten away” with things, but to help make it clear that many people make a mistake, learn from it, and move forward, even if admin was nor involved.

    OP - I hope you are feeling better.
     
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  9. whizkid

    whizkid Connoisseur

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    Dec 4, 2021

    None of this will matter 20 or 30 years from now.
     
  10. vickilyn

    vickilyn Multitudinous

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    Dec 4, 2021

    I would venture a guess that the only person to care about this in even a single year will be Teach200, but for that individual, this may be a pivotal "lesson learned" that stays with OP, in one way or another, for years to come. I don't mean that in a negative sense, but more of a life lesson that will create a moral compass that becomes a positive influence going forward. I hope that OP feels the same way, and will embrace the life lesson that comes out of the experience. I suspect that OP will regain self confidence, maybe a little wiser for the wear, and in accepting that we are all capable of making mistakes, able to see things going forward with new perspective. I certainly wish OP all the best going forward, and if a change of jobs arises going forward, I would encourage OP to see the big picture as time goes by, creating wisdom and compassion for any other person who may make a similar mistake.
     
    Last edited: Dec 5, 2021
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  11. Tired Teacher

    Tired Teacher Connoisseur

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    Dec 15, 2021

    I hope things have gotten better since you posted this. We all have made mistakes. Try to be as kind to yourself as you'd be to a friend who made the same mistake.
    Missy brings up a good point above. 1X I was startled by a very loud noise and yelled the Sh word in front of 30 3rd graders. The kids' mouths dropped open. Their eyes got wide. I was sure everyone would go home and tell. I thought about telling on myself, but just got sidetracked. Then I never could get up the nerve.
    I think I worried about it for at least 2 weeks. It turned out that I never heard a word about it. The principal may have heard about it, but never mentioned it. Best wishes!
     
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  12. Teach200

    Teach200 Rookie

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    Dec 16, 2021

    Things have gotten a little better with other administrative staff but not the principal. She's still so cold towards me. Does not acknowledge my presence....seems she still hasn't let it go. I'm starting to think I may have unknowingly offended her in some way?

    I don't know. Its just so stressful. I'm trying to be better.

    Thank you all for your kind messages
     
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  13. vickilyn

    vickilyn Multitudinous

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    Dec 16, 2021

    Is she that warm with other new teachers? She may not be good with people she doesn't know well, needing time to connect. OR, she could be like one principal who never seemed to engage, yet was capable of writing positive things. If your paths don't cross that often, and sometimes that does happen with principals, her demeanor may not be an accurate gage of true feelings. You can't fix what isn't broke, in that case.
     
  14. Teach200

    Teach200 Rookie

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    Dec 18, 2021

    No, not really. From what I've seen, she isn't so warm with new teachers. This is my second year working with the school. During my first she was extremely pleasant and very welcoming. I cant say the same about now.

    This whole incident has caused me so much anxiety. I have started with job search. Its sad when all your hard work and effort is overlooked by just one mistake you did...and an innocuous mistake for that matter.
     

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