How to handle disrespect?

Discussion in 'General Education' started by riverdance85, Sep 29, 2013.

  1. riverdance85

    riverdance85 Rookie

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    Sep 29, 2013

    I have been teaching now for almost three years, but I still get upset when a student disrespects me. I know its the group I have...but how do other teachers deal with being disrespected? Talking to the student and parents help, but yet disrespect persists. They sass and whine. I find it hard to be tough with them because I've had parents call me to apologize to students when I've been too hard. Suggestions? I reckon I should just face it everyday and keep talking to disrespectful kids and calling parents. My issue is that I find it hard to stop thinking about the next possible time it could happen...and I get so down! I am always happy and cheery in my classroom and try to instill enthusiasm in my students.

    Thanks!
    HS Spanish teacher.
     
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  3. 2ndTimeAround

    2ndTimeAround Phenom

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    Sep 29, 2013

    Blatant disrespect gets called out, right then and there. Just as I would someone throwing something across the room, shouting out answers and such. I'd also have the offender stay after class and speak to me about his behavior. If it happened a second time I'd call his parents in for a conference, not just speak over the phone and the child would be assigned a detention. Third time would be an office referral.
     
  4. Ron6103

    Ron6103 Habitué

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    Sep 29, 2013

    Outright disrespect of course shouldn't be tolerated, but I think it also depends on what you view as disrespect? You mention whining... my students whine about almost everything schoolwork related. They're not hostile about it, but they'd just rather do nothing on many days. I don't really view that as disrespectful, but rather a product of being a teenager. It's similar with the sarcasm... if they're sarcastic toward me and are outright rude/cruel/angry, that's one thing. But I have kids say stuff like "this assignment is lame" --all the time. I usually respond with something like "we don't need the side commentary" -- and move on. If it persists, obviously I will respond more clearly, but most of the time, a kid will make a sarcastic remark, I'll reply briefly, and move on.

    All that said, it's probably a matter of personality too. I can respond to a snide comment with some remark to shut it down, and move on without it really phasing me or getting me upset. After a few weeks with a new group, most start to see that their comments have no impact, and it generally stops on its own. The teachers in my building who I see have the most trouble with discipline issues are the ones who visibly get upset at most student commentary... many of the kids in my building like to see that they've "gotten to" a teacher, and thus keep it up.
     
  5. BookReader813

    BookReader813 Companion

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    Sep 30, 2013

    Teenagers are whiny. That's nothing new, and you probably shouldn't take it personally. If they whine about an assignment, shut them down. Say, "I'm sorry you feel that way, but this is what you're doing today." Then move on. Show them that you don't have the time for their complaining about assignments.

    When I subbed in a junior high school, I made the mistake of letting disrespectful comments get to me. That's all they wanted. They wanted to see me squirm and get upset, and I did. They had a heyday with me after seeing me get upset. I admit that I shouldn't have done that. But, as a result, I've learned when to let disrespectful comments slide (under their breath, whispers to their friends, etc.) and when to call them out on it (out loud, while I'm teaching, etc.). I usually give them one chance to tone it down. After that, I issue a detention (to let them I know I am serious about the consequences) and have a chat with them about what's bothering them. I genuinely want to know why they make disrespectful comments because maybe it's something we can fix together.
     

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