How old were you when you had your children?

Discussion in 'Teacher Time Out' started by TennisPlayer, Oct 25, 2008.

  1. TennisPlayer

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    Oct 25, 2008

    Do you like the number of years apart between the children or does it matter? I like to plan as much as possible, but understand that life isn't always like the way we think it will be! (I don't have children yet)
     
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  3. smalltowngal

    smalltowngal Multitudinous

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    Oct 25, 2008

    I was 23 when I had my first daughter, and 26 when we were pregnant with daughter #2.

    My daughter is 4 (will be 5 in Dec). We were pregnant last year which would have meant 4/5 years between the two girls. My sister and I are 7 yrs apart which hasn't really affected our closeness. We will probably try when our daughter is 7.
     
    Last edited: Oct 25, 2008
  4. Aliceacc

    Aliceacc Multitudinous

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    We adopted Brian when I was 40, after 10 years of trying. Six months after his arrival, I was pregnant, and then again 3 years later.

    So my kids are 10, 8 and 5. I don't know anything different, so this is perfect for us.
     
  5. teacherSMK

    teacherSMK Habitué

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    I was 23 when I had my first daughter, and I was 23 when I got pregnant with my second daughter. They were born 13 months and one week apart. I love their closeness, and God knew what he was doing. I can't have anymore, so I am glad I had my girls when I did. :D
     
  6. Matt633

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    My girls were 2 and a half years apart (2 school years) and it was perfect. They are 22 and 25 now. I had them when I was 24and 27.

    My 25 yr old daughter has two children that are 16 months apart. I do not recommend it...way too close. But they are precious and I LOVE BEING A GRANDMA! I spend every available minute with them. They lived with me for 18 months...that was a little too much!!!
     
  7. Matt633

    Matt633 Comrade

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    SMK...God Bless you because I know how much energy it takes to keep up with two little ones that close in age, but you are right, my grandchildren (a boy & a girl) are very close and so are frends of mine that have two daughters 14 months apart.
     
  8. ZoomZoomZOOM

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    I was 30 when I had my son. And after that, I was done. (Husband "unloaded the gun.") ;)
     
  9. MrsC

    MrsC Multitudinous

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    I was 30 when my son was born and 33 when my daughter was born. Alex was born at the end of November and Lauren the beginning of February. Although they are only just over 3 years apart, they were 4 years apart in school. Lauren is loving being able to go through her high school years without her older brother there!
     
  10. TeacherShelly

    TeacherShelly Aficionado

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    I was 32 when my two girls were born....
     
  11. cosmoteach

    cosmoteach Rookie

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    I was 26 when I had my son. Have been trying for another child (for last three and a half years)...but does not seem to be in the cards right now. I am so lucky to have one blessing that I will be okay if I can not have another child...but would love to expand our family!
     
  12. TeacherShelly

    TeacherShelly Aficionado

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    Spacing? Twins! It is a dark time for about a year, with increasing brightness until wonderful times hit around 4!
     
  13. Beezus

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    My children are very close in age, too (well- the first 3 are!)
    17 months between DD1 & DD2,
    13 1/2 months between DD2 & DS1
    There's actually only 2 1/2 years between my first child and my third. Talk about a busy time in my life!! I actually often refer to events in my life as "when the kids were 3, 2, & 1", or "6, 5, & 4" (or whatever they were when said event occurred).
    There are 5 years between DS1 & DS2.

    Even though I was so incredibly busy. I loved that the kids had built in playmates. They were and are incredibly close. They played so well together and had lovely imaginations. DH and I were just saying we wish we could go back and live that time over again!
    My older ones are 21, 20, & 19 now. (The teen years became very expensive, by the way). Now poor DS2 is the only one at home, and he is horribly bored without the older sibs!!
     
  14. mmswm

    mmswm Moderator

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    I win the closest non-twins contest...my youngest two are one day short of 11 months apart. DS 3 was born on May 25 and DS 2 didn't turn one until June 24th :D. My oldest is 25 months older than ds2. There's three years and two weeks between ds1 and ds3. As somebody else said, it was a very busy time in my life, especially the first six months of ds3's life, when he was in NICU, then PICU. At one point in all of that, ds1 was admitted to PICU for a couple days...in a different hospital. My husband had left me so I was doing this as a single mom. Sometimes I look back and wonder how I did it.

    Anyway, to the point of the original post, I was 23, 25 and 26 when they were born.
     
  15. GlendaLL

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    I was 29 years old when I had my son. My husband was 41 years old. Our son is almost 23 years old now. I think that we are done having kids!!
     
  16. ecsmom

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    Oct 25, 2008

    23, 28, and the day after my 31st birthday. :)
     
  17. Beezus

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    Oct 25, 2008

    Oh! I forgot...
    I was 23, 25, 26, 30 when my children were born.
     
  18. CanadianTeacher

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    Mine are 19 months apart. I was 23 for the first and 25 for the second. I'm happy I had my kids young and I'm also happy I had them close together. If my hubby would have been ready sooner, I probably would have had the first a couple of years earlier. I've noticed a slight drop in energy since hitting my mid 30's and I can't imagine having young kids right now. I'm glad I did it while I was at my energy peak. As for being close together, this has been great too as my kids are extremely close. My sisters and I are not close, nor are we close in age (me 38, next one 28, next one 24). I really would have loved to have a couple more, but everything happens as it should since I would never have been able to go back to school and become a teacher had I had more kids--it would have been financially impossible and who knows where we'd be now if I had not gone back to school...
     
  19. agdamity

    agdamity Fanatic

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    I am 26 and pregnant with my first.
     
  20. Aliceacc

    Aliceacc Multitudinous

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    Oct 25, 2008

    Congrats!
     
  21. mmswm

    mmswm Moderator

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    on a side note, I don't think age has much to do with the closeness of siblings. I'm much closer to my sister who's 13 years younger than me, than I am to the sibling who's 13 months younger than me. I think it has more to do with the temperment and personalities of the kids involved. All of my kids would rather be only kids at the moment...:D
     
  22. tgi1515

    tgi1515 Comrade

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    I was 37 and 41 when my boys were born. Both were wonderful surprises because I thought I was too old to have kids. 4 years between is a wonderful age difference. They can have their own friends and activities but they also get along and have someone to "do something with" if they are home together. (not perfect, but good most of the time.... after all, they are brothers.)
     
  23. peggy27

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    I was 23 and 26 when my kids were born. They are now almost 24 and 21. One was out of diapers and the next one came. 2 and half years is a good spacing. They go thru phases when they are close and when they are not.
     
  24. Weazy

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    I was 22 and 27 when my boys were born. The spacing has worked out for us, and they are very close. Me and my sister are 15 months apart--I don't know how my mom did it!! We fought a lot gowing up, but we also took up for each other. We are very close now! (WE are close to our two younger brothers, too!)
     
  25. MrsWbee

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    I was 18 when I married and took on two stepchildren, a 3yo girl and a 1yo boy. About 6 months later, I was completely surprised by my pregnancy, so when I had my daughter I was only 19. The kids are all about 26 months apart. I had always thought that by the time my daughter turned 3, we would start trying, but it didn't turn out that way. G-d willing, we will have more sometime fairly soon, but in the meantime I am happy to enjoy the three that I have :) My hubby, however, has the most serious baby fever I've ever seen in a man, and insists that he wants to start trying right now, and that he wants 8 before we are "done"! :dizzy:
     
  26. Ms. I

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    Oct 26, 2008

    I don't have kids myself yet, but I think a couple should be married at least 1-2 yrs 1st to just enjoy each other as a married couple.

    I think the perfect age to have kids is btwn 26 & 30. But I definitely think 40 is too old.
     
  27. chemteach55

    chemteach55 Connoisseur

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    I was married for 9 months when I found out I was pregnant for my 1st daughter. I was 22 when she was born. I was on the pill when I got pregnant for her so we kind of gave up on BC at the point but it took 3 years to get pregnant for daughter #2. We were definately not using BC because it took 3 years to get pregnant for #2 so 11 months after she was born, I was pregnant for #3. That time was very hard. I was on complete bedrest and had a 4 year old and a 1 year old. I was 26 at the time and knew my family was complete. By 29 and due to endometrosis, I had had a complete hysterectomy. It was very difficult for me when they were young but as a family we have a great time now. My husband and I are 42 and 47 and our kids are 20, 17, and 15. We are usually the youngest parents at school functions etc.
     
  28. Aliceacc

    Aliceacc Multitudinous

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    Ouch. That's when I had my FIRST.
     
  29. MsMar

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    I had my son at 28 and my daughter at 30. They're both Feb birthdays; in fact my due date for both was the same exact day. My daughter wasn't born until over a week past my due date though so their birthdays are about 2 week apart. I love that they're two years apart in age. They're very close and I hope that will last (they're 6 and 8). I think having them two years apart would have been a lot harder except for the fact that my son is very easy going and my daughter was an incredibly easy baby. So at ages when it could have been extra hard, I had it pretty easy compared to what it could have been. My son was a tough baby and my daughter was a tough 2-3 year old so had she been the one born first and then him it would not have been pretty those first 2 years!

    I don't really think there's a "right" age to have a baby. It's different for everyone. For me the age I had mine was right, I know others who had their first at 40-42 and that was right for them.
     
  30. Mrs. Q

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    I was 22 when my son was born. He's only 9 months old; DH and I plan on waiting at least 3 more years before we have another. I'd like to get my career established before adding to the family.
     
  31. Writer's Block

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    I don't agree with this AT ALL. Each couple is sooooo different, that putting these restrictions on them is unfair. My husband and I decided on our wedding night to "see where the cards fall." We definitely enjoyed "married life without children." We traveled, went out a lot, enjoyed each other's company on Sunday mornings while reading the newspaper and not even saying a word to each other. All this time, we were trying to have a baby. After five years of infertility, we have our two daughters (who were adopted). Infertility STRENGTHENED our relationship. I knew if he could go through this with me, then he was "good to go for the long haul."

    Saying 40 is too old is ridiculously unfair. Way too many women are getting married later in life as they are establishing careers. If a woman is fortunate enough and wants to get pg into her 50s, then she should! Why should a couple wait "1-2 years" to have children if they are both in agreement to have them within the first, say, 2-3 months of marriage? I was 31 when I got married, my first daughter was born when I was 36, and my second daughter was born when I was 38. They are 17 months apart. If I decide to adopt a third, are you saying that because I will be 40 next year that I am "too old?" Having children is a personal decision. Good for all of you women on this site who were 40+ when you had children. Congrats to all of you "younger" ones who had children younger.

    With the financial pressures of today, people are focusing on stability before they begin families. Sometimes that doesn't come until later in life. I wasn't ready for children when I was "26-30." Aren't my daughters better off because I waited?

    Again, having children is a very personal decision. Putting restrictions on that is very unfair.
     
  32. Ms. I

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    Oct 26, 2008

    Sorry if I offended you, please don't take it personally. My mom didn't have me until 36 & I probably won't have kids until I'm in my late 30s or even 40 myself. I have to get married 1st. :)
     
  33. Aliceacc

    Aliceacc Multitudinous

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    Nope, I didn't take it personally. (Just as I hope you don't take it personally when I said MY stuffing is the best in the world :) )

    My sister and brother both have grandkids, while I have a 5 year old. Things happen when they're meant to happen.

    And having 3 young kids has most definitely kept me young. Some of the younger teachers at school were stunned to hear that I turned 50 this year.
     
  34. lemonhead

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    I was 32 when I had Thing One and 36 when I had Thing Two:)

    They are 3 years 8 months apart but a full 4 years apart in school (8th grade/4th grade both boys). They will never be in the same school again. It would be neat if they were a little closer in age but it's all good.
     
  35. dizzykates

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    I use to think I wanted kids around 25. I managed to get married by 25 though, so now we are discussing the next year or two to start working on kids. I am still thinking about everything I want to do though, places I want to go, but I think that is just in my spirit because I know I love kids and desparately want my own. We are finding that the economy combined with our house size is very going to make having kids something we need to be very careful about, we don't have a yard and not a lot of indoor space either. Is that going to stop us from having kids? Nope, but we have to be very conscience of our future plans to move out in a tmely manner. Sorry, I got a little off topic.
     
  36. loves2teach

    loves2teach Enthusiast

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    Oct 26, 2008

    I am 27, and I haven't had a child yet. Was hoping to already, but dh isn't ready.

    I do not have any siblings, but my niece and nephew are 5 years apart (almost too far apart in my opinion- she is having to be more of a helper for him instead of enjoying a sibling). My husband and his brother are exactly 13 months apart to the day. They drove my MIL crazy!
     
  37. MissWull

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    Well I'm 26 now and I would like to have kids before I'm 30. My husband and I want two...and I would like to have my first when I'm 28 and my second when I'm 30. BUT...the way the economy is going along with the no need for teachers in CA (and everywhere else practically) we may hold off because I really want to be settled in my teaching career...but then again seeing as how that may not happen until I'm almost 30, we may just have to do it no matter what...at least my husband is settled in his job.

    I know this was "how old were you when you had your kids" but I just wanted to participate!! hehe. :)
     
  38. cMcD

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    I'm 23. I'm shooting for marriage at 26, and having my first baby at 28. I hope to have another at age 30 and be done. But I know that things change...
     
  39. Crzy_ArtTeacher

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    Well I'm 23 now... I always thought I was ready for children at the drop of a hat. Now however, when I'm the most stable I've ever been in my life with a house, a wonderful hubby, a teaching career.... I've realized that as much as I may dearly dearly want a child I have to be responsible about it. Financially it would be so so hard on us. I don't think we could afford day-care and our mortgage at the same time.

    It was actually a big topic of discussion last night with us and it came up the idea of me staying home with the children. I felt crushed and destroyed about the idea of not being with my students everyday. As a woman I feel this huge tear between what I want/should do.

    Thankfully I am not in a predicament to have to start dealing with what having a child entails. However, honestly I believe things will happen when they are supposed to and we'll work it out regardless of our financial woes.
     
  40. Kindergarten31

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    I was 35 and my husband was 50 when we had our first. Our son is now 21, but my stepson is 48. I guess that is TOO big of a gap!:lol:
     
  41. DHE

    DHE Connoisseur

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    Oct 28, 2008

    I was one month and a day from making 22 when I had my first and I made 23 a month b4 having my second. The 1st two are 14 mths apart, then nine years later I had #3 followed by #4 16 mths later. My parents had us in twos(6 of us) and l;ook like I was following my mother, so I stopped. Seriously I had because I nearly died with #4. They are now 12, 12, 20, 22. I was 31 and 33 when I had the last two. Happily I can't have anymore now. I am way too old for me(43), though this may be the perfect age for others.
     

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