How often do your students SOB from being reprimanded?

Discussion in 'Elementary Education' started by Em_Catz, Dec 15, 2010.

  1. Em_Catz

    Em_Catz Devotee

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    I work in the primary wing with K, 1st and 2nd grade. OMG, there ALWAYS seems to be someone crying from being reprimanded. Since I have the luck :rolleyes: of being one door down from our school primary discipline room, many of them pass me.

    Today alone, I counted 34 students! 34! :eek:

    In the breakroom teachers gripe daily and I hear numerous stories that begin with, "Yeah, I made so-and-so cry because s/he did..."

    My students however, rarely cry. I have two boys, one who teases and one who is very immature, that if I talk to them firmly and tell them I am dissapointed in them, their eyes well up and they need tissues, but they don't outright hollar and sob.

    Are some classes just more mature than others? My first two years teaching and last year, I had at least 2 - 3 kids cry a day when reprimanded.
     
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  3. Sarge

    Sarge Enthusiast

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    Last year I had several students who would have major meltdowns whenever they got in trouble - and they got in trouble a lot. One girl would have screaming tantrums, go home and tell mom I was mean. Another would tell his parents whenever he thought my consequence was too strict.

    This year, not the case. They cry when they get hurt, and a few cry when they are frustrated etc. One boy was in major trouble over playground behavior last week. This behavior was unprecedented, so he was surely not going to have much fun at home for a while once his parents found out. He cried and I honestly don't blame him.

    But for the most part, when they mess up, they are pretty good about taking the consequences. I think that the kids in the other classes you describe are the ones for whom this behavior is working at home.
     
  4. czacza

    czacza Multitudinous

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    A tear every now and then, but NEVER sobbing...I don't want to break kids down- I work on proactive strategies and correct behaviors with a positive, cooperative management philosophy.
     
  5. DrivingPigeon

    DrivingPigeon Phenom

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    I have only seen kids sob if they are very sensitive, and it usually isn't over being reprimanded. For example, a kiddo lost his glove the other day, and he sobbed for about 10 minutes. I do see kids tear up once and a while. One of my kids just did today, actually.
     
  6. Em_Catz

    Em_Catz Devotee

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    Ah! It does always stem back to the home. I didn't take that into account. I have met the parents of almost all my students and with the exception of a couple, most are no nonsense. Oddly enough though, I have a child who cries a lot at home, but has never once cried in my class. Some kids are better for the teacher than their parents I guess. Kinda like I am way more patient with my students than friends and family.

    :thumb: I'm the same way. Positive reinforment works for me
     
  7. Em_Catz

    Em_Catz Devotee

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    Edit: Incase anyone is wondering, each time i saw a crying kid past my door, I made a small tally mark. There were probably way more than 34.

    Normally I dont keep track, but hey, gotta keep things interesting.
     
  8. halpey1

    halpey1 Groupie

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    Hmm, not too often, but not unheard of in kindergarten either. Being a man, I try to discipline with love and go softly, but I've made a few cry in my years.
     
  9. teach'ntx

    teach'ntx Comrade

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    I have students who cry when they get a note home saying they are going to be spanked or hit. Sadly, I am sure some have more than a spanking waiting at home. However, I can not use this as a reason not to send a note when needed. I have one boy who is spanked anytime he is not on green (perfect behavior). Talking to someone on campus who knows him, his family and their background explained that is the culture of many of our refugee families. He explained they do not abuse, but they rule with a strict hand when necessary.
     
  10. amaran20

    amaran20 Rookie

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    I teach 4th grade and I've never seen so many boys SOB!!!! I have one student who goes to the back of the room and cries every day. I have such emotionally needy kids, so my situation isn't normal.

    These kids aren't crying from being disciplined either.Sometimes it's difficult to figure out exactly WHAT is making them cry. That's not to say that when I call parents I don't see some tears, but more often it's for some outside reason.
     
  11. kteachone

    kteachone Companion

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    I actually had a Kinder last year who wet her pants the one and only time she got in trouble with me--she was crying that hard. She had to move her clip to yellow for talking--not anything serious. I felt so awful :(
     
  12. jteachette

    jteachette Comrade

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    I have a couple who cry when they have been caught doing something wrong. I tell them that it isn't going to work, and they still have to take a break, so they might as well stop. They do.
     
  13. massteacher

    massteacher Companion

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    I have some kids cry, but more so because of dealing with social issues (so and so only wants so and so to talk to them!!)...I have one that will cry occasionally who is definitely emotionally fragile..and when she cries, she SOBS very, very loud..it takes her probably a good 10 minutes to calm down. Oh kiddos.
     
  14. Proud2BATeacher

    Proud2BATeacher Phenom

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    I have one who cries for any thing and every thing. Any time he is redirected or reminded of a rule will result in tears. He is the same way at home.
     
  15. wrice

    wrice Habitué

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    Couple tears every once in a while in 5th grade. But always try to separate action from person- disapprove of what they did, not who they are. I think they have to be taught how to react, less about tears and more about how to fix it or make goals not to do it again.
     
  16. UVAgrl928

    UVAgrl928 Habitué

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    Last year I had two criers.... it was almost daily with both of them! It was every little thing that they would cry about... most of the time nothing that I did. They were two very immature boys (and agewise they were slightly younger than the rest of the class). It would get so bad sometimes I would send them next door to headstart until they calmed down.

    So 1st grade made sure I didn't get any criers this year... and then I had a student move from another school. He gets himself so worked up I'm afraid he's going to hyperventilate! Someone looks at him the wrong way and it sets him off (no joke- he told the admin people were picking on him because they looked at him and smiled).
     
  17. 3Sons

    3Sons Enthusiast

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    Given the number of teachers here who have indicated that they've cried at work, I would have thought there might be more caution about labelling sensitive kids "immature".
     
  18. Super2ndGrade

    Super2ndGrade Rookie

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    I used to have a very sensitive student. When I reprimanded him, he would laugh ang say, "You're funny." When I said I am not joking, his eyes would well up with tears and he would sob and run around the classroom, sometimes even into the hall.


    Nothing is hard. It is challenging.
    -my 3rd grade teacher:)
     
  19. Lynnnn725

    Lynnnn725 Connoisseur

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    Every time I read the post subject.. .I think the poster is calling someone a SOB. Throws me for a loop... =)

    I haven't made anyone cry (yet), but I do have one that cries if he thinks someone is going to tell on him.
     
  20. monsieurteacher

    monsieurteacher Aficionado

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    I have a student with severe intellectual delays in my class (he was with me last year too). If he gets in trouble, I will often have a talk about how disappointed I am in him. It isn't until I see the tears coming that I know I've gotten through to him, because he knows how disappointed I am in his choices.
     
  21. thirdgradebuzz

    thirdgradebuzz Comrade

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    I have not had many students outright sob. I can hardly remember a time that has happened. However, I have had many cry when being reprimanded. While that is not my goal at all, I make it clear to the students that I care about them and only want the best for them, and let them know in a one on one setting that I am disappointed in them when they act out.
     
  22. kteachone

    kteachone Companion

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    There is a difference between being immature and incredibly stressed out.
     
  23. passionateacher

    passionateacher Comrade

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    Maybe because it's quarter til 6am and I just woke up for a "midnight" snack...but it took me a minute to figure out what SOB stood for! I was thinking "What in the world does S-O-B stand for?!" Then I started reading your post and the lightbulb came on----"OH, sooobbb!" :lol::blush:
     
  24. flutterbye

    flutterbye Rookie

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    I am currently teaching Kindergarten. This is my second year in that position. Last year I had a child who cried to manipulate. When she saw it did not work she stopped and tried threats, whatever to keep me from telling mom she got in trouble- not because mom was mean, but because she wouldn't get to go to the dollar store and get a coloring book if she didn't stay on green (perfect) all week.

    This year I have one super crier. If I shake my head no at a behavior of his (this is my first step to correcting inappropriate behaviors) he breaks down and climbs under his desk to have a screaming crying fit. Other teachers come to check on me because they think someone has been seriously hurt. some kids, especially at this age, have no idea how to express themselves. Their language development just has not gotten that far yet and they don't know another way. When I have a very emotional child I wait until they calm down and give them paper and a variety of writing utensils (pens, markers, crayons, pencils) and have them draw a picture of what they feel. It takes a while, but eventually when they get strong emotions they will go the writing table and draw it out.

    I have one in my class this year that has had very angry outbursts I have tried this with. He brought me a paper yesterday all covered in red and purple scribbles with a face in black crayon under it. He handed it to me and said "I'm mad and that's what it looks like"

    I shared with the school counselor but feel we have made some real progress here.
     
  25. UVAgrl928

    UVAgrl928 Habitué

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    I also think that there is a difference between crying when you have reached your breaking point, and crying daily to get your way.
     
  26. 3Sons

    3Sons Enthusiast

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    Indeed there is. Consider the difference between a student being reprimanded by a teacher, and a teacher being reprimanded by a parent.*

    I have reason to believe that most teachers label rather quickly and use the word "immature" rather expansively, and simply want to advocate for caution.

    Despite the phrasing of my first post, though, I don't mean this as a personal criticism of anyone on this thread. I'm sorry if it comes across that way.

    * No, seriously. Actually consider it.
     
  27. luludc

    luludc Rookie

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    I've never been reprimanded by a parent. I'm also not sure how that would happen, as I'm not subordinate to parents. Rather, parents and teacher are partners in educating children. If a parent has a concern about their child's progress or something going on in the classroom, we would discuss it. But I do not take orders or reprimands from parents.
     
  28. Sarge

    Sarge Enthusiast

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    I've been reprimanded by parents. But they were wrong so I laughed behind their backs instead.
     
  29. JaimeMarie

    JaimeMarie Moderator

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    I have one student that does that scream cry. So very irritating. We ignore it. At least he stays at his seat area now instead of hiding. He does this when he doesn't get his way with the other students, does it if I speak to him about what ever behavior he is doing that isn't appropriate.

    I have one that wells up and will silent cry. She is my youngest with a July birthday.
     
    Last edited: Dec 18, 2010
  30. JaimeMarie

    JaimeMarie Moderator

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    We seem to share the same student. Mine can turn the scream cry on and off on cue.
     
  31. jennyd

    jennyd Companion

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    I thought the same thing! :blush:
     
  32. jennyd

    jennyd Companion

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    I taught first grade for a few years, and there was one year where I had several sobbers. Loud, heard throughout the whole building sobbing. And over the most inconsquential stuff! (like moving your clip down to yellow).

    I even had one who would have made a great protester - on the occasion when I asked her to leave the room because her sobbing was so distracting she either went limp on the floor, or stuck her arms and legs out stiffly so she wouldn't fit through the door as I tried to walk her there.

    Ahhh, the memories ;)
     
  33. JaimeMarie

    JaimeMarie Moderator

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    Jenny,
    Are you in the same district? Wouldn't it be funny if she walked into your classroom as a middle schooler!
     
  34. monsieurteacher

    monsieurteacher Aficionado

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    I also have a little guy with autism whom I absolutely ADORE! However, he does tend to cry when I am reprimanding anyone! One day I had to ask my TA to take him out to do something in the library for a while so that we could have a class discussion about behaviour issues (since he wasn't really involved, and he would only cry and distract everyone from the real issues.)
     
  35. SunnyReader

    SunnyReader Companion

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    I teach special education and there is A LOT of sobbing. Most times it is because someone said something mean to someone else, they do not understand the work, or someone hit someone. these are students with emotional issues, so it is not uncommon for more than 5 students to sob a day. They are very lovable and just need a hug when they are upset. The sobbing usually lasts about 2 minutes at most.
     
  36. jennyd

    jennyd Companion

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    I'm in the same building! (it's a small school) But she moved away, so there's no chance of seeing her. I do have a bunch of kids that I had as first graders and it's nice to see them a bit more grown up. They really don't change much at all.
     
  37. 2ndTimeAround

    2ndTimeAround Phenom

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    LOL, and how, exactly, does that work? How does a parent reprimand a teacher? Parents aren't my bosses - I can't even imagine one attempting to "reprimand" me.

    Now, complain, oh yeah, btdt. Yell? Yep. Lie about me? That too. But they can only voice their concerns to me, they cannot reprimand me. The actual idea is comical to me. Now, they *can* voice their concerns to my real boss and he can take up any issues with me. But that's about it.
     

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