Here is a rough draft of my thank you letter for the job fair

Discussion in 'Job Seekers' started by Peachyness, Mar 8, 2008.

  1. Peachyness

    Peachyness Virtuoso

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    Mar 8, 2008

    Here is a rough draft of my thank you letter after the job fair. Please, pretty please look over it. I included a paragraph that was in my cover letter and then I added another paragraph that I found somewhere but it fits me perfectly! Anwyays, please let me know what you think.




    Dear Ms. XXXX:
    I wanted to take this opportunity to thank you for speaking to me at the XXX County job fair. I enjoyed meeting with you and I learned a great deal about XXXX School District.

    In my three years as a teacher, I have successfully taught at both ends of the Elementary School spectrum. I began my career teaching Kindergarten, and my students were reading and writing by the end of the year. In my current fifth grade class, I am teaching my students the skills needed to be successful in junior high. All of my students have shown remarkable growth and, above all, enjoyed their year in my class.

    My experience in teaching minority students that come from challenging environments has provided me with a strong repertoire of classroom management skills along with a broad array of instructional strategies to ensure successful differentiation to meet the needs of my students. My pursuit for excellence and love of learning set the tone for a nurturing, positive environment wherein students are able to take risks and rise to the standards and expectations set forth for them.

    Once again, thank you for the opportunity to speak to me about teaching at XXX School District. I am excited about the prospect of working with such a dedicated team of professionals. Thank you for your time and consideration, and I look forward to hearing from you.

    Sincerely,




    Peachyness





    OH! by the way. I met with three people for this one school district. I have the names for the two, but I cannot for the life remember the name of the guy. Should I call the school district? Will someone there know. Should I give a fake name so they don't know it was me? :rolleyes:
     
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  3. jw13

    jw13 Groupie

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    Mar 8, 2008

    Dear Ms. XXXX:
    I wanted to take this opportunity to thank you for speaking to me at the XXX County job fair. I enjoyed meeting with you and I learned a great deal about XXXX School District.

    In my three years as a teacher, I have successfully taught at both ends of the Elementary School spectrum. I began my career teaching Kindergarten. My students were reading and writing by the end of the year. In my current fifth grade class, I am teaching my students the skills needed to be successful in junior high. All of my students have shown remarkable growth and, above all, enjoyed their year in my class.

    My experience in teaching minority students, who come from challenging environments, has provided me with a strong repertoire of classroom management skills along with a broad array of instructional strategies to ensure successful differentiation to meet the needs of my students. (Sentence seems too long) My pursuit for excellence and love of learning set(s) the tone for a nurturing, positive environment wherein students are able to take risks and rise to the standards and expectations set forth for them. (This sentence seems long. It tends to run on. Can you make two sentences out of it?)

    Once again, thank you for the opportunity to speak to me about teaching at XXX School District. I am excited about the prospect of working with such a dedicated team of professionals. Thank you for your time and consideration, and I look forward to hearing from you. You can reach me at #####
    Sincerely,

    Also, check out the district website for the guy you can't quite remember. Otherwise, yes call to find out. It is a great extra touch to have their names. Or you could just sign is Peachyness:D
     
  4. Peachyness

    Peachyness Virtuoso

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    I did check the website. There are many guys who work for the upper grades so that didn't really help.

    Thanks for the tips!!!!!!
     
  5. lemonhead

    lemonhead Aficionado

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    Hi Peachy

    I was just wondering if you chose the things you chose to highlight because you wanted to or because those things would be the most applicable to that particular district.

    Also, I think the word should be set and not sets because you are talking about two things your persuit and your love. So I think you had it right.
     
  6. lemonhead

    lemonhead Aficionado

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    I tried to mess with it. My stuff is in blue.

    Lemon

     
  7. lemonhead

    lemonhead Aficionado

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    Mar 8, 2008

    Here it is cleaned up with mine and jw's suggestions.

    I am a little worried about rising to the expectations set forth for them. Doesn't sound real student-centered

    Dear Ms. XXXX:
    I wanted to take this opportunity to thank you for speaking to me at the XXX County job fair. I enjoyed meeting with you and I learned a great deal about XXXX School District.

    In my three years as a teacher, I have successfully taught at both ends of the Elementary School spectrum. I began my career teaching Kindergarten. My students were reading and writing by the end of the year. In my current fifth grade class, all of my students have shown remarkable growth and, above all, are enjoying their year in my class.

    My experience in teaching minority students, who come from challenging environments, has provided me with a strong repertoire of classroom management skills and a broad array of instructional strategies to meet the needs of each student. My pursuit for excellence and love of learning set the tone for a nurturing, positive environment wherein students are able to take risks and rise to the expectations set forth for them

    Once again, thank you for the opportunity to speak to me about teaching at XXX School District. I am excited about the prospect of working with such a dedicated team of professionals. Thank you for your time and consideration, and I look forward to hearing from you. You can reach me at #####
    Sincerely,
     
  8. jw13

    jw13 Groupie

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    Great job, Lemonhead! Thanks for fixing my faux pas. Sorry Peachyness for giving incorrect grammar advice(math is my strong point).
     
  9. funeoz

    funeoz Comrade

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    Mar 8, 2008

    okay...a couple of thoughts...

    sometimes i wonder if short and sweet isn't the way to go with a thank you. i wonder if you don't want them thinking "that was a sweet card to send" versus..."oh dang...more crap to read"

    just a thought.

    otherwise, i think it looks great.
    but this sentence sounds awkward to me...
    Once again, thank you for the opportunity to speak to me(i feel like it should say you) about teaching at XXX School District.
     
  10. lemonhead

    lemonhead Aficionado

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    No it is correct with me. I thought it was wrong but I reread it and she has it correct

    But you could say with me rather than to me.

    I wanted to take this opportunity to thank you for speaking with me at the XXX County job fair.
     
  11. Peachyness

    Peachyness Virtuoso

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    Thanks guys. I really did try to keep it short and sweet. Perhaps there's something I can cut? I really do see what you mean! I want the first paragraph to stay because I want to emphasize the experience I've had. But, I also want to discuss the experience I've had with low ses students, which is a large population at that school. Hmmmmm....


    Thanks for the help lemonhead. You guys ROCK!!!!
     
  12. funeoz

    funeoz Comrade

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    i think it is just a tough decision of whether to send a more formal letter on paper versus a three sentence card. i think the way you have it is great. i don't know what the right answer is or how i would do it in your shoes.

    the alternative i'm talking about is something like this inside of a card...

    Dear So and So,

    Thank you so much for taking the time to talk with me at the job fair. I really enjoyed the opportunity to share my ideas and experiences with you. I am excited about the prospect of working for your district and hope to hear from you soon.
     
  13. jw13

    jw13 Groupie

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    How about this change? Since you want to emphasize SES, just state the grades you taught and SES experience.
     
  14. funeoz

    funeoz Comrade

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    Are they making decisions right now about who to interview? I guess maybe then you do want to sell yourself as much as possible. Were you able to share these points with them during the job fair and/or are they in your other cover letter and resume. I think if you haven't already had a chance to share these things, then it is best that you point them out.

    One other thing...is minority the PC term these days. I feel like I try to use other words.

    also...that sentence still seems strange to me and it took lemon reading it more than once to make her decision...could you say something like thank you for taking the time (or opportunity) to talk with me.
     
  15. funeoz

    funeoz Comrade

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    I like that jw13.
     
  16. jw13

    jw13 Groupie

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    Funeoz is right...how about "diverse group of students?"
     
  17. funeoz

    funeoz Comrade

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    yeah...diverse is the word i was trying to think of. thanks jw
     
  18. Peachyness

    Peachyness Virtuoso

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    Okay, here are the changes so far. My only concern is the sentence in red is too long. Do you guys think so??

    I wanted to take this opportunity to thank you for speaking to me at the XXXX County of Education job fair. I enjoyed meeting with you and I learned a great deal about XXXX School District.

    My experience teaching students in both kindergarten and fifth grade along with teaching diverse group of students, who come from challenging environments, has provided me with a strong repertoire of classroom management skills and a broad array of instructional strategies to meet the needs of each student. I have also developed many instructional strategies to meet the needs of my students. My pursuit for excellence and love of learning sets the tone for a nurturing, positive environment. Students are able to take risks and rise to expectations set forth for them.

    Once again thank you for taking the time to talk with me about teaching at XXXXX School District. I am excited about the prospect of working with such a dedicated team of professionals. Thank you for your time and consideration, and I look forward to hearing from you. You can reach me at XXX-XXXX.
     
  19. Peachyness

    Peachyness Virtuoso

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    Mar 8, 2008

    :D
     
  20. funeoz

    funeoz Comrade

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    were the diverse students in the kindergarten and fifth grades that you taught?

    if so...you could say something like...

    I have had the experience of teaching a diverse group of students in kindergarten and fifth grade, who come from challenging environments. This has provided me with a strong...
     
  21. funeoz

    funeoz Comrade

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    Actually, though, I think the long sentence might be okay. It reads pretty well.
     
  22. lemonhead

    lemonhead Aficionado

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    Funeoz-

    I think it depends on the interview. Maybe for job fairs you have to say a little more. I am more inclined to keep it short and pick one thing to talk about.
    I liked what you wrote. For my most recent interview I am saying this unless you all think I shouldn't. (Borrowed some from Funeoz)

    Everyone: Whatcha' think?

    Dear So and So,

    Thank you so much for taking the time to interview me on Saturday. I really enjoyed hearing your goals for Blah Elementary and the opportunity to share my experiences with you. I truly believe that children always come first in education and I hope I made it clear that your vision for for Blah resonates with my beliefs. I would be honored to join your team and I look forward to hearing from you soon.

    Sincerely,

    Lemonhead
     
  23. smalltowngal

    smalltowngal Multitudinous

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    Good luck!
     
  24. lemonhead

    lemonhead Aficionado

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    You think it is okay with the changes STG? or no?
     
  25. smalltowngal

    smalltowngal Multitudinous

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    Mar 9, 2008

    yes
     
  26. funeoz

    funeoz Comrade

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    I think it sounds great.
     

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