Getting respect in classroom

Discussion in 'Preschool' started by Christine M Fay, Jul 24, 2019.

  1. Christine M Fay

    Christine M Fay New Member

    Feb 15, 2019
    Likes Received:

    Jul 24, 2019

    I have been in child care work for 20 years. I used to love it and the children. Now I hate going to work. Everyday is Soo hard. I am on the verge of quitting very soon. I have seen 2 teachers walk out in one week, no joke. I don't see any happy adults in the day care. I do understand why. We who work as day Care providers are not respected by the children or parents. What is going on? I see so much bad behavior. Every single child in that center has something wrong. The children are so bad and unruly, it looks like a zoo in the 2 yr old room.. children rolling around in the floor screaming, fighting, sitting on tables, undrt chairs, throwing food , humping syuffed animals! OMG I am in prek. The children are horrible. I try so many times to play games with them , they end up fighting each other, they poop and pee themselves just because they didn't feel like going to bathroom. I get hit or spit on daily. When u tell the parents, they roll their eyes and walk out! WTF!! I feel like a servant, s punching bag, a maid, none of thset children are made to clean up after my room I can have 12, so when one child leaves , another room. Is bringing me a child!!! I am at 12 all day. Doesn't anyone else think 12 /5 yr olds is too much for one person! It's not like back in the 80's & 90's when children were happy and listened to me.thus the children today do not listen at all.please help
  3. catnfiddle

    catnfiddle Moderator

    May 8, 2008
    Likes Received:

    Jul 25, 2019

    I've moved this to the Preschool forum so the fine folks who work with that age group can give you some input.
  4. Preschool0929

    Preschool0929 Cohort

    Sep 2, 2012
    Likes Received:

    Jul 25, 2019

    So it sounds like there’s a few different issues happening. Just to focus on the children though, here’s some things to think about:

    what does the structure in your center look like? Does the classroom have a set routine and a visual schedule that is being used consistently?

    Are there age appropriate expectations in place that are explicitly taught and reinforced frequently?

    Do children have a variety of age appropriate toys and activities available daily? Are they explicitly taught how to use their toys?
    Obadiah likes this.
  5. Obadiah

    Obadiah Groupie

    Jul 27, 2015
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    Jul 31, 2019

    Children of that age group suddenly popping into the classroom just because another child leaves is just asking for trouble. They need routine and structure.

    Interesting news article at

    I'd seriously recommend more open space and fewer tables and chairs if they are becoming a safety hazard or are contributing to unruliness.

    I do find that there comes a point where a teacher can only do so much. If the parents aren't rearing their children, then the teacher certainly can't become a parental substitute--not with 12 of them in one classroom. If I might even venture a guess, these parents do not feed their children fruits, vegetables, and whole grains; the restroom chaos is a prime clue. Improper fuel for a child leads to unruly behavior. My car won't run properly without proper fuel; neither will a kid's brain and body.

    Parents rolling eyes; I might venture another guess. Their disciplinary procedures are to curse and yell at the kids. How many times does discipline consist of screaming, "Oh, Jesus Christ! What are you doing now!" Worse yet, how many kids endure a drunken parent's physical abuse or watch a parent endure it from another parent? Even the root word for discipline indicates that correction involves teaching, teaching a child right from wrong, teaching a child what is better and best, teaching a child conflict resolution. But again, many children learn from example that conflict resolution means screaming, hitting, and kicking. Many children learn from example, yes, from their parents, that "better and best" mean "getting what I want and I want it now!!!" (Kind of like the one girl's tantrum in Willy Wonka's chocolate factory).

    And studies show that many parents rarely speak to their children (except when they yell at them). If a child prior to age 3 does not hear at least 20,000,000 words, they will be language deficient. Language deficiency inhibits brain development that inhibits proper behavior within various contexts such as a classroom or daycare setting.

    I'm not so sure "respect" is the main problem. If the kids are living in a chaotic world, their unruly behavior is their way of coping. Imagine walking into a strange dark room with no light. You will stumble and bump into things. A child who lacks guidance and physical stamina is going to stumble in behavioral expectations.

    And then there's videotization. (I know, I made the word up, but that's what it is)! Videotized kids might be great at watching Sponge Bob or zapping Martians, but they are missing the brain development that comes from being read to, brain development that leads to empathy and good decision making. Mike Mulligan's steam shovel did more for my childhood development than Bugs Bunny ever could.

    OK, I've ranted long enough. The question is, what to do? I would recommend restructuring the structure. I would avoid table sugar like the plague. True, sugar does not make kids hyper, that's a myth, but it does restructure the brain chemicals that a child uses to manage their own behavior. I would use the floor more than tables and chairs, if the tables and chairs are a problem. Big books and story time would be a major portion of the classroom. I'd avoid competitive games, and if cooperative games lead to problems, I'd try individualized games, Romper Room style (from the early 1960's). Bouncing a ball in place while the kids stand in a circle and sing a song, bending and stretching--let's see if I remember it:

    Bend and stretch
    Reach for the stars
    There goes Jupiter
    Here comes Mars

    Bend and stretch
    Reach for the sky
    Standing on tippy toes
    Up so high

    I can't believe I still remember that! Anyway, that's what I mean by individualized games. Sorry I need to cut off now or I'll be late. Hope things do work out for the better, but again, alas, there's only so much a teacher can do.

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