Gender Perspecitve Conflict

Discussion in 'Teacher Time Out' started by Securis, Mar 25, 2012.

  1. Securis

    Securis Cohort

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    Mar 25, 2012

    Or, I could have said Women vs. Men in the ways they think.

    Anyways, Here's what happened. We had a group of participants from our summer program visit for a weekend to see how they would respond to a weekend program that we already have in place for another group. There may be some integration but who knows.

    So, evening one, were sitting around the dinner table having our meal and I walked by one of my co-workers, a very nice young lady, whom I respect and like in a platonic way. I noticed she was sitting at the table and that her shirt was high on her back as well as her pants being cut a certain style that gave her the stereotypical plumbers crack. I noted it and went on about the meal and interactions with our campers.

    Later on the transition between our meal and our next activity, I decided to let her know about her wardrobe malfunction. for our environment, it is customary to address issues such as this openly and honestly because of a marquis effect policy. It is also our work culture to hold others accountable to certain standards.

    It was an awkward conversation but I said to her it would be and would just address it. SOooo, I did that. Specifically, I said, "Name, I want to tell you something and it's awkward so I'm just going to say it. Your pants were low in the back while you were seated and showed too much..." I trailed off because the awkward had reached a crescendo. And looking back, that was best for that part.

    Now, three days later, she commended me on doing so but the entire weekend she was angry with me for my timing and my presentation. Embarrassed, is more what I understood but I could see her point on why she was angry.

    She recommended that if ever I had to disclose such feedback again, that I should approach another woman, mutually familiar with the both of us, and have her explain the wardrobe malfunction.

    So, what I'm asking is which was better. My direct approach or her indirect approach? And I do understand that for her, her approach is best for her. How did I do overall?
     
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  3. JustMe

    JustMe Virtuoso

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    Mar 25, 2012

    I'd like few people to know about my little peep show as possible. Hey, you saw it...might as well tell her instead of bringing in more audience members.
     
  4. czacza

    czacza Multitudinous

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    Mar 25, 2012

    I'm sure she was embarrassed...you did nothing wrong but you should respect her request for the future.
     

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