After a very brief overview of the Cold War for a book we were reading... Student: Ms. Chebrutta, why do you know so much about history if you aren't a history teacher? Me: Well, I read a lot of books. Student: Like, for... fun? Me: Yup. Student: Ew. I guess I don't want to be like you when I grow up.
They try to get credit just for the answer. I tell them they get more credit for showing the work. When they tell me they did it in their brain, I reply that I can not put a credit on their brain and they can not turn in their brain. So they lean toward me as if I can put a credit on their head.
A few gems recently in my class: "Was Romeo Black?" "No, he was... Mediterranean." "Oh so he was Mexican." Student: Boy, sit down and leave me alone. Me: Student, mind your business and leave him alone. Student: He started it. I just needed to regurgitate! Student 2: You better not throw up on me! Student 3: I think you mean retaliate. The assignment was to translate the balcony scene into text messages, how modern teens would talk. Romeo: I'm outside of your window. Juliet: Creeper. The End
(8 year old boy to 8 year old girl) "All girls grow mustaches eventually. Do you have a mustache yet?"
Student "Is the principal your Dad?" Me: "Oh no, why do you ask because he tells us to do things?" Student: "No, not that, because he is like old." Me: "You just made my day" He (the principal) is 12 years YOUNGER than me!!!! LOL
I teach a little one credit how to transition to college class for college freshman well I had a bunch of stickers that I had bought for my daycare kids leftover from my summer job, so I figured that I would put them on my college freshman students' papers to get rid of them. They were obsessed with the stickers! They would trade with each other and every time I passed back homework they would beg me to put scratch and sniff stickers on their papers. I couldn't believe that students in college would get that excited about stickers! They were definitely an interesting class haha
When I first started teaching we still used a plan book. We had to turn the plan book in on Fridays & got them back on Monday. We got a sticker in our book. We noted when we didn't get a sticker. Anyway, you should have heard the complaints when that P left and a new P came in. No more stickers!
We learned about the nervous system this week. It was news to some of the students that emotions come from the brain, not the heart. Student: Even love comes from the brain? Me: Yes. Student: So instead of saying "I heart you" we should say "I brain you"?
We have been handing out mints every morning this week because it is our state test week. I ran out Friday morning. When I informed my third graders of this, one blurted out "How do you 'cpect me to WORK under these conditions?!?" I just about died laughing, then went and found him a mint.