Tomorrow is my last day of work before summer. We had our evaluations today. This year was my first experience in a full-English immersion classroom. I had up to 18 students in my room for an 80 minute English class that didn't speak ANY English. I also didn't have a co-teacher who spoke Chinese. It was just me. I only had three different classes this year, but this year was harder than my first year teaching. Hands down. Classroom management was a huge issue for me this year. My kids came to me on the first day not even understanding, "Hello!", so I had to work my butt off this year trying to get my kids in line. I had many struggles, but I feel like I got my kids under control and they did learn a lot of English. It wasn't perfect, but I got them to the point where they only spoke to me in English! Yes, it was very limited, but they did it! Also, the curriculum we were given was Cornerstone. It wasn't appropriate for my kids at all. It didn't even teach them the alphabet! I had to make phonics curriculum from scratch. Well...I have my evaluation and my admin told me that my classroom management is too "free" and that I need to be more stern with my kids. I do agree with him on this. I'm naturally soft spoken, but I've learned to become more firm. I taught 7th grade for three years and was really successful managing my classroom. I've got a lot of tricks up my sleeve. I did my best this year, but I feel like it wasn't a good representation of what I'm truly capable of and have done. This year has been rough, but something else my administrator said was really discouraging. Next year I will teach a self-contained first grade classroom with a Chinese co-teacher. My students are those with developed/slightly advanced English skills. I'm piloting the program and am currently developing the program right now. I was CHOSEN to do this job next year, but today my admin told me that I need to make sure that I am able to manage the kids next year so when it's time to learn they actually are ready and listen...also they way he said this was like a warning. I'm quite good at receiving constructive criticism-I actually really like to receive it and welcome it. However, this cut me to the core. He left and I felt super upset and just burst into tears. I never cry about things like this! I'm a fourth year teach for gosh sakes! I feel like I don't deserve to teach the new pilot program next year. I feel like I will fail. I feel unappreciated and I don't feel what he said was fair considering that he's been in my classroom TWICE this year. TWICE. I guess I just need a break. I also just needed to get this off my chest.