Facebook question?

Discussion in 'Teacher Time Out' started by dogs&teaching, Jan 31, 2010.

  1. dogs&teaching

    dogs&teaching Comrade

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    Jan 31, 2010

    Ok, so I have a Facebook account that I've had since I was in high school years ago. I moved an hour away from where I grew up and use Facebook to talk with my friends I don't get to see.

    Well, one of my students, a 5th grader, found me on Facebook and sent me a friend request. I refused it. A couple days later, I got another request from her. I told her grade teacher that she had sent me another request after I had denied her the first time. (I also denied the second attempt.) I also mentioned that it was very odd at the time because she had sent the second request during school hours.

    I had told her teacher upfront that I wouldn't accept it whatsoever. We had a discussion on how Facebook can be so construed and that is why I wouldn't accept it.

    Although this student is persistant and sent me ANOTHER request. I denied it and said "Being a teacher and you as my student, I can not accept you as a friend." She then replied why.

    What do I say now? Should I leave it as that? Or do I say something else? Either way I printing out the message and taking it to my principal in the morning.
     
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  3. Iowa_Teacher

    Iowa_Teacher Rookie

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    Jan 31, 2010

    I would agree that you should not accept her as a friend. I teach high school and have had some past students add me, but as we are not friends or peers, I don't feel bad ignoring their requests. I haven't had any current students add me. I would mention it to the principal just so he/she is aware and it can't come back on you. Good luck!
     
  4. smalltowngal

    smalltowngal Multitudinous

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    Jan 31, 2010

    I would talk to this student in person about how right now since she is currently your student, you can not accept her as your frien don facebook; however (and this is only if you're comfortable with it then) after she moves on to another grade level/school then you would be happy to have her as a facebook friend. I work with a teacher who has several students as friends on his fb, and that makes me nervous.
     
  5. Emma35

    Emma35 Connoisseur

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    Jan 31, 2010

    Simply tell her you don't accept students as friends. Period! You don't need any further explanation.
     
  6. giraffe326

    giraffe326 Virtuoso

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    Jan 31, 2010

    Not that I have anything to hide, I also prefer not having students as FB friends. What I did do was open a second FB account where I accept students (current and former) as friends. I do like keeping up with them especially because I send them off to middle school. I post no status updates. Actually, I do nothing besides keep up with students and send my main account gifts (like for Farmville :blush:).

    You can block people, and then she will not be able to find you no matter how hard you search. I have our VP blocked.
     
  7. yarnwoman

    yarnwoman Cohort

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    Jan 31, 2010

    I agree with what the others have already posted. However the thing that keeps going through my head is does this child's parent(s) know that they have a facebook?

    After all Facebook states" No information from children under age 13. If you are under age 13, please do not attempt to register for Facebook or provide any personal information about yourself to us. If we learn that we have collected personal information from a child under age 13, we will delete that information as quickly as possible. If you believe that we might have any information from a child under age 13, please contact us through this help page."

    Maybe you should contact facebook.
     
  8. Cerek

    Cerek Aficionado

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    Feb 1, 2010

    Last year, I had one of my son's classmates send me a Friend Request on FB. Since I knew her from my son's school (never taught or subbed at the school), I reluctantly accepted. Not long after that, I clicked "Ignore" on a "Become a fan of..." request she sent (which I do to most such requests, regardless of who sends them). The next day, I got a message from her saying "You are no longer my friend" and she blocked me. :rolleyes:

    During my internship, several of my students asked if they could send me Friend Requests after discovering I had an FB page. I told them I do not accept requests from students - period. It wasn't because I didn't like them or had anything to hide, I just considered it a bad policy to accept requests from students.

    After my internship, I have considered creating a "school" FB page specifically for accepting students as friends.
     
  9. Aliceacc

    Aliceacc Multitudinous

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    It's entirely possible she sent the request while she was home sick, thus during school hours.

    I'm not sure I would take this to the principal-- what do you expect him to do?

    I'm not on facebook, but as I understand it, you can "ignore" her and you won't be bothered by these requests.

    But know that she, and all her friends, now know exactly where to find your page. Assume that everything that's written there is shown to the parent of every child you teach, and of any principal at every school you'll ever apply to.

    Sorry, occupational hazard.
     
  10. silverspoon65

    silverspoon65 Enthusiast

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    Just because they can find her doesn't mean they can see anything on her page.

    I would just keep ignoring her and tell her you do not think it is appropriate to add students as friends. I actually don't even think it is "legal" for her to have a facebook page at her age. I am pretty sure there is an age minimum when you sign up, so she would have lied about that to get the page in the first place.
     
  11. giraffe326

    giraffe326 Virtuoso

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    All the kids I know on FB are friends with their parents, so their parents know they are on there. They just lie about their age. All you have to do is enter in a birthday and click a button saying you are 14.
     
  12. catnfiddle

    catnfiddle Moderator

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    Pointing out that she is too young to be on FB in the first place IS a good place to start. You don't have to actually report her, just gently mention that she is breaking the rules and you don't want to aid and abet.
     
  13. dogs&teaching

    dogs&teaching Comrade

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    The reason I did talk to her teacher was to see if she was sick, but she wasn't.

    My school is very small with 5 teachers and the principal. We all are really close and we can tell each other things.

    The whole reason I'm telling my principal is because I would rather her know what happened in case things somehow got turned around.

    My profile is only available for view if you are my friend. I also have a list of people I block what they see on my page. Not that I have anything incriminating but I just don't want someone think the wrong thing on some notes I have posted and such.
     
  14. Maryhf

    Maryhf Connoisseur

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    I have a FB account in my full name which is slightly different than what the students call me so most of them do not find me. Earlier this year a student tried to friend me. I ignored it and talked to her in person. She seemed to understand my position (no students as friends) but then she used her mom's account to try again. I just ignored it again. The problem went away.
    I have NO secret life and my FB account is terribly boring but I still don't want students there.
     
  15. Hoot Owl

    Hoot Owl Aficionado

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    Continue to ignore her, she'd drive you crazy on FB!
     
  16. Ima Teacher

    Ima Teacher Maven

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    Block her. That way she can't send you a request again.

    I accept my students as friends, but I put them in a "special" friend group that is blocked from seeing my pictures, my wall posts, and my information. I also don't allow them to send me inbox messages. I also hide them so I don't see what they do. They're just happy to be on my list. Silly kids.

    I pretty much know all of their parents anyway. Small town.
     
  17. yarnwoman

    yarnwoman Cohort

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    Feb 1, 2010

    I understand that but lying does not make it right! I have turned in kids that I know are not old enough. I look at it as I am helping to protect them.
     
  18. kcjo13

    kcjo13 Phenom

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    My personal rule is no friends under 21. I am not as worried about them seeing what I do (which is terribly boring most of the time), but me seeing what they might be doing, illegally. I don't want to put myself in that position.

    I do have 3 exceptions-my nephew, who is 20, and his soon-to-be exgirlfriend, who is about to get unfriended due to the way she treated him! The last is the student I used to interpret for, when he went away to school in New York. But, he is now over 21, so that's not really a rule breaker. I do have other former students as friends, but only after they become 21.

    My students are sixth graders, so many of them either have or are soon to get FB accounts. I see just tonight, one of my students must have gotten his account, because a bunch of my friends accepted him. A lot of teachers. Not this one! I just ignore. I don't owe anyone an explanation!
     
  19. dogs&teaching

    dogs&teaching Comrade

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    Feb 2, 2010

    Today, I had a discussion with all the students at the elementary about Facebook. I told them I would not accept any students if they sent me a request. I told them if they would try, I would report them to Facebook for being under 13.(Considering this is 5th and younger, all of them are under 13) And I would also notify their parents.

    I know it might seem a little drastic, but technology isn't always safe. Especially at their age. I told them the pros and cons of Facebook and why they don't even need to have one at this young of an age. It is also to cover me. I don't want people to think the wrong thing about the friends I have on there.
     
  20. catnfiddle

    catnfiddle Moderator

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    Feb 2, 2010

    Good job! This is the smartest route.
     

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