Eeek, another cover letter (but I need your help!)

Discussion in 'Job Seekers' started by eireannashley, Nov 28, 2010.

  1. eireannashley

    eireannashley Rookie

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    Nov 28, 2010

    Hi everyone,

    So I am re-writing my cover letter for the third time. I just wanted to get some feedback because I do not feel as though who I am shines through. Any info would be amazing. I am looking to getting into the Chicago Public Schools as a heads up and I also was wondering if I should mention that I am planning on getting a reading endorsement as well as an ESL endorsement (classes start in the spring).

    Thank you so much!



    Dear Dr. Blah Blah Blah,

    It is with great enthusiasm and interest that I am applying for the grade 5 position at XXX. I am highly qualified based on my education, experience and special skills.

    My education at Monmouth College has allowed me to gain hands-on experience with children of all ages in a wide variety of schools. I student taught in a second grade self-contained classroom and have had several aiding experiences which have allowed me to observe and participate in a number of diverse institutions. Taking something away from each experience, I have been able to develop my student-centered teaching philosophy and classroom management plan.

    In 2009, I improved my skills by teaching ESL to students in Costa Rica as part of the World Teach Volunteer Organization. When arriving in Costa Rica Ms. Loebach just didn’t quite roll off their tongues properly. My new name became “teacher” or when produced with a Tico accent, “ticher.” Everyone in the town knew me as “ticher”. It became my new name. Wherever I am, my head still spins when I hear the t-word. It is who I am and my passion for teaching continues to grow. In Costa Rica I learned Spanish and improved my own communication skills. I also developed ways in which to teach students with diverse cultural, environmental, and economic circumstances as well as how to reach each student as an individual. The skills I have learned and developed at Monmouth College and in Costa Rica have helped me to have a successful year working as a TBE long term substitute with culturally diverse students.

    Since each student is his or her own person, I work hard to get to know my students. Discovering each student’s personal motivators helps me in developing working relationships and sparking interest in academic subjects. Although I am careful to treat students fairly, I recognize that some students are in need of additional attention or understanding. I believe it is important to not only be encouraging to students but to challenge them with innovative teaching methods.

    An active listener and adept communicator, I am confident in my abilities to fit in well with your students, parents, teachers and administrators. I would appreciate the opportunity to show you what an excellent addition my skills and enthusiasm would bring to your school and I look forward to interviewing with you soon to further discuss my qualifications.

    Thank you for your time and consideration.

    Sincerely,


    Me
     
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  3. paperheart

    paperheart Groupie

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    Nov 28, 2010

    Here are my suggestions, :2cents:

    5 change to five
    Monmouth College--Is this an important detail? If Monmouth does not have a particularly saught after teacher prep program, leave this off.

    paragraph two--you were redundant with the idea of diverse experience. tighten it up.
    paragraph three-love it. I would flip this with the second paragraph--it is interesting.
    paragraph four-this sentence is awkward. "I believe it is important to not only be encouraging to students but to challenge them with innovative teaching methods."
    maybe change it to, It is important to encourage and challenge students with innovative teaching methods." You can also combine these sentences, "Since each student is his or her own person, I work hard to get to know my students. Discovering each student’s personal motivators helps me in developing working relationships and sparking interest in academic subjects."

    paragraph five-sounds great.

    Overall I think you could send it now and be okay. It seems a little long because some sentences are redundant. I definitely think your enthusiasm shines through. Good luck!:thumb:
     
  4. tgtbtj

    tgtbtj Companion

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    Nov 29, 2010

    I personally think I owe the fact that i have my job to the cover letter I had. Some people on this forum were very helpful. The cover letter I had before was very cookie cutter and didn't say anything about me. Some others on this forum stated that principals like to read something a little different from the same old cover letters that are just like everyone elses. I like the second paragraph in that it stood out from the others and it was interesting. I would try to put a little more or "you" in there and take out some of the buzz words that don't really mean anything. Good luck though you seem to be on the right track!
     

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