Crying on the second day UPDATED WARNING: This post will pretty much sound like a random stream of conscience. If you asked me Sunday, you would hear that I was slightly nervous but very excited to start school on Monday. I had slaved over my room, planned out my procedures, and written my plans in detail. It is now Tuesday evening, and I have cried four times in the past three hours. I used to think that classroom management was a strength of mine as I student taught and as I worked at my previous job as an Out-of-School Time Facilitator for six years. HAHAHAHAHA!!! I have TERRIBLE classroom management! My kids just won't quiet down no matter what I do. I have taught our signal for quieting down, and I wait to move until all students do it, but this still doesn't help. They seriously cannot be in a quiet straight line for anything. It drives me up the wall! I'm not okay with small chit chat in the hall. My students MUST be quiet as a mouse as there is learning going on. It took us 25 minutes, yes 25, to use the restroom today as I can only send four in at a time. A teacher suggested to me that I bring a timer for 10 minutes and any time past that will result in time lost from recess (which is only 10 minutes anyways). Today I couldn't even finish reading the book because my students would not get quiet. I even read it extremely quietly which only helped for about a minute. We've only gotten through about half of what we needed to get through these past two days. I introduced my clipchart to my students today. It's a chart where students may move up and move down. I had two students move down and then they just shut down. I had one student that took forever to return to the rug, and when he did he just laid there for about five minutes. Another student walked out of my class which resulted in me having to stop teaching (which made my class loud), go out in the hall to get him to come back in, and then he just walked around the room. I told myself to pick my battles, but then he started lightly kicking my chairs enough for them to make noise. I am just done. I realize that I am the one who can change this, but I just feel so powerless right now. I feel like a failure of a teacher, and I found myself thinking, "I'm still contracted to just over nine months of this." I'm so ****** off with myself that I cannot control seven year olds. As I'm saying this, please keep in mind a few things. This school is 90% Free/Reduced Lunch and I came from a school that was 10% Free/Reduced Lunch. All of my practicums/student teaching was in the spring, so I was never able to see how setting up a school year went. We've spent LOTS of times on routines and modeling them and was even complimented on this yesterday. I have now cried four times since I sent the kids back home. I just NEED to get this class under control by the end of this week in order to ensure a successful school year.