Cover Letter Help

Discussion in 'Job Seekers' started by jennaleigh, Jun 5, 2015.

  1. jennaleigh

    jennaleigh Rookie

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    Jun 5, 2015

    Hi, I am trying to revamp my cover letter so it includes more specific details and examples and things that are not on my resume. At the same time I am trying to not be too wordy and lengthy as I tend to be! This is what I've come up with so far -- any advice is appreciated. I know it is very long! Thanks. :)

    Dear Mr. X:

    I am writing to apply for the fourth grade teacher position at X Elementary School for the 2015-2016 school year. I am excited to have the opportunity to apply for a position in a district that is dedicated to seeing its students succeed at the highest level. I would love to be a part of a district that believes in empowering students and helping them fulfill their dreams. (this changes depending on the district/school I am applying to)

    As an educator, I am passionate about diverse, inclusive education and using culturally responsive strategies. I believe that doing so creates a classroom of culturally aware learners and provides an environment where all students have the same opportunities for success. Throughout my four years at X College, I had the opportunity to work with students from a variety of religious, ethnic, and socioeconomic backgrounds. In these experiences, I incorporated multicultural literature into my lessons and encouraged my students to share and show pride in who they are through journals, presentations, and classroom discussions. One of my most memorable teaching experiences came when I taught second graders about my own Hanukkah celebrations and saw their eyes light up with excitement as they played dreidel, ate Hanukkah gelt, and read about the meaning of the holiday.

    I also believe that a safe and warm classroom environment is essential to learning success. During my student teaching experiences, I used positive reinforcement, open communication, mutual respect, and effective classroom management techniques in order to build an environment conducive to learning. My strategies for classroom management often aligned with the school-wide commitment to PBIS, including a game I created during my time in second grade called “The Kind Kitty” that promoted positive behavior and relied on intrinsic motivation to build a united classroom community.

    From letting seventh graders design their own Middle Ages final projects to teaching second grade math using a cooperative learning approach, I used student-centered teaching methods in order to meet the needs of all my students, along with the RTI approach. My lessons adhered to the Common Core and Wisconsin Academic Standards while engaging students through the use of hands-on learning activities. I also incorporated technology into my teaching by utilizing devices such as SMART Boards and iPads to play educational games, create projects, and review material.

    I am not only dedicated to teaching children, I am passionate about helping them set their own goals, seeing them succeed both in and out of the classroom, and molding them into lifelong learners. I believe my creativity, enthusiasm, and dedication would be a great fit at X Elementary School. If you have any questions or would like to set up an interview, please contact me at (XXX) XXX-XXXX or emailaddress. Thank you for your consideration. I look forward to hearing from you soon.

    Most sincerely,
    My name
     
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  3. jennaleigh

    jennaleigh Rookie

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    Jun 6, 2015

    nothing? :( yikes is it that terrible LOL
     
  4. mathmagic

    mathmagic Enthusiast

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    Jun 6, 2015

    Working on report cards and thus only a brief comment: I would try to frame your letter like you did in the 2nd paragraph -- the 3rd and 4th become to resume-oriented as opposed to highlighting specific moments that make you stick out above the rest. What moments do you have that highlight your safe and positive learning environment? The use of technology?

    (That said, T.G. will be around to provide plenty of tips eventually, I'm sure :))
     
  5. jennaleigh

    jennaleigh Rookie

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    Jun 7, 2015

    Thank you! I will keep working on that. Good luck with the report cards. :)
     
  6. TeacherGroupie

    TeacherGroupie Moderator

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    Jun 7, 2015

    Good to see that you're customizing each letter to the district/school recipient.

    For the rest, there are interesting little flashes of YOU here and there, but they tend to get swamped by the relentless tide of buzzwords and of wordiness in general.

    In a cover letter for a job teaching fourth graders, I'm not sure it makes sense to give what sounds like an account of college teaching more space in your second paragraph than you give the charming anecdote about teaching Hanukkah to second-graders. In any case, that paragraph can be pared down to about half its length.

    (The goal of a cover letter isn't to recap the resume: it's to make you sound interesting enough that the hiring people will WANT to read the resume.)

    Have you read your letter aloud? Doing so might help you notice the complex sentences that get out of your grasp a bit.
     
  7. mcqxu

    mcqxu Comrade

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    Jun 7, 2015

    I think that this cover letter lists some great experiences you've had, but it is way too long and honestly no one would have time to read it in depth - it needs to be shorter. I agree with others to highlight specific qualifications and moments, and perhaps rather than several paragraphs use your intro paragraph tailored to each district/school and then perhaps bullet points listing some of your experiences and qualifications, then keep the final paragraph at the end.

    Hope that helps, and good luck!
     
  8. jennaleigh

    jennaleigh Rookie

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    Jun 9, 2015

    Thanks all. :)
     
  9. ktmiller222

    ktmiller222 Cohort

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    Jun 9, 2015

    Overall, I think your letter is great and you have great experiences. I believe it's way too long. I think you shouldn't include all of your experiences. I think just highlight your most proud moments or experiences you learned the most in. When you are in your interview, that's when you can impress them and inform them of everything that you have done. I would take out at least one paragraph and shorten one other one. Hope this helps!
     
  10. jennaleigh

    jennaleigh Rookie

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    Jun 9, 2015

    It does, thank you. :)
     

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