I’m a new teacher at a nice private school. I have one of my co-worker’s children in my class. So far, I had not too much interaction with her. She has the reputation of being unhappy with her children’s teacher and often going to the admin about them. She’s been a teacher for years, so the admin always takes her suggestions super seriously. During open house, she came to my room. First off, I was very nervous. At my last school, I did not have to give a presentation in front of the parents. I gave my powerpoint, and she and her husband asked several questions (her husband was condescending). I did not know the answers to a few questions, and she supplied the answers herself. The next day the admin calls me in to their office about what I said at open house and basically goes point by point by what I said. They point out what I said wrong. They said I should run my class more like Mrs. X’s class (the co-worker) because her class runs so smoothly. My partner teacher says Mrs. X loves to run to admin for everything and likes getting co-workers in trouble. Today, I was at recess duty. My partner teacher was having detention when one of the admin walks in holding a test I graded. The admin is confused about why I wrote re-do on the test and let scratched out a few of the “x’s” on wrong answers. My partner teacher explains how in the first 9 weeks, we give children the opportunity to retry their test questions if they failed. I scratched out a few “x’s” and grades because I did not know the procedure. My partner teacher said the child’s name on the test was Mrs. X’s child. First off, I don’t know why the admin had to go to my partner teacher about my grading. Luckily, my partner teacher defended me. But, I think it’s unprofessional to have discussed it with my partner teacher(she’s teaches another class, she’s not a co-teacher). Second, I am getting really unhappy/frustrated with Mrs. X’s running to the admin about every little qualm she has about me. I don’t know if it is really Mrs. X running to the admin though most of the evidence clearly points in that direction. I am not really sure if I can confront her because I don’t have any real evidence that’s it’s her. Another incident happened during a game today in class. Some kids were out of the spelling game and supposed to be sitting in their desks. A boy was swinging between desks and accidently hit Mrs. X’s child. The girl had a complete meltdown and I sent them both to the office. The principal told me to email to document the incident. She emailed me back saying she’s is going to contact Mrs. X. Now, I don’t know Mrs. X will think or what she will say to the admin. I’m unhappy. I feel like every day I am under a microscope. If I mess up in anyway, the admin most certainly knows about it. It’s hard for me to be perfect since I am completely new! Thoughts? Am I overreacting? I know I am assuming that Mrs. X is complaining about me, but I don’t understand why she can’t ask me directly and has to go over my head to the admin (especially when we are co-workers and work in the same building!).
This sounds so frustrating. I wish I had a good answer for you. It's hard to feel comfortable in that situation.
I also find it to be unprofessional for adminstration to approach your colleague about your grading. Had she been a co-teacher and you were busy, maybe. Maybe. But as it is, there was no reason that I can imagine for him/her to not discuss the concerns with you. It seems like this mother/colleague may make for a challenging first year. Just do the best you can do. That's all we can do...
Sounds like the I school I left. I know you read my story bc you posted in it. I sooo feel for you bc I know what it's like to be "watched" by big brother daily. Like you said, you are new, so you are going to make mistakes and not know the protocol for every little thing. Wait, so the principal came up to you holding up the test?
No, I was at recess duty. She talked to my partner teacher instead. And, I wouldn't even had known there was a question about my grading if my partner teacher hadn't told me about her talking with the admin. I can't even go to the admin and follow up because my partner teacher doesn't want me to let on that she told me. :unsure:
I had a fellow teacher's child and she was a nightmare. I finally confronted her and got it all out in the open. She was not happy about that. However, things are fine now. She finally realized all of her complaints were happening when I wasn't even there and that they were all exaggerated stories. I think it is different for you though, because you are very new. Can you cautiously feel around and find someone to help you through this? If you are feeling this way about her, you can rest assured that others are too. You don't want to start any trouble, so be careful. What would happen if you went to the principal and had a talk? Just get it out in the open?
Did this teacher/colleague request you for her child? Over the years, I've had quite a few teachers' children. However, teachers throughout the district have the luxury of hand-picking a teacher for their own kids, so I'm assuming that the teachers had confidence in my teaching abilities--otherwise, I wouldn't have been chosen. I must admit, though, that having a teacher's child in your class adds an extra layer of pressure (for me, at least). Keep your head held high and stand your ground!!!
I have thought about going to the VP because she is more level headed than the principal. The thing is that the admin have never told me that Mrs. X complained about me. I just deduced it for myself. I think it would be a tricky thing to bring up to the admin without bringing other co-worker's gossip into it. I am new and don't know everyone's relationship and don't want come off as dramatic or overreacting. I do have another teacher to help me through this, so try to get her advice if it gets worse.
When I talked with the teacher and the principal/director about the situation, they were as baffled about her complaints as I was. Turns out, the things she complained about were not true and that the things she said were happening after I had gone home for the day. I was slightly devastated because in 21 years, I have not had one single complaint about my teaching abilities or the way I managed the children. In fact, just the opposite. So you see, sometimes the facts get twisted and distorted. It might help if you have a heart to heart talk with the principal and try to get some clarification as to what it going on with her.
opps, I see we posted at the same time! Well, at least you have someone to confide in. I just wonder if you could talk with this teacher and ask her if she has any concerns. Maybe you could become "friends?" Just a suggestion! I'm pretty straight foreword, so maybe that's not something you want to do yet. Do you have conferences coming up?
I am not sure. My partner teacher is super strict and would probably call out Mrs. X's on her behavior. My partner teacher said doesn't think Mrs. X wanted her, but I don't think she choose me or anything. I would keep my head held high, but this is my first year teaching elementary (I taught middle school for one year before) and I am very neurotic and unsure of myself. I also have 3 strong cases of unmedicated ADHD in my class, so things are never completely smooth. I am also getting use to elementary kids and figuring out how much to baby them.
I would, but now I am scared because of this whole incident of her daughter getting hurt in my class. I am afraid if I bring it up, she'll lay into me. We're on a 9 week schedule, so in about a month we will have conferences.
