Beyond frustrated and really can't wait for June.

Discussion in 'Elementary Education' started by txmomteacher2, Apr 3, 2014.

  1. schoolteacher

    schoolteacher Habitué

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    Apr 5, 2014

    You have a right to teach without this major disruption in your room, and your students have the right to learn in a quiet environment. Once you fully embrace that idea, you will be empowered to handle this situation.

    I had a crier last year who was just as you describe. The entire hallway was disrupted by his ultra loud crying. I looped up with him again this year. I understand your frustration and how detrimental this can be to your frame of mind.

    I found that the only way to deal with the child was to keep a close eye on him. As soon as he started to show signs of crying, I sent him out of the room - either to another teacher down the hall, the bathroom to wash his face, or to the office. He could not reenter the room until he was done making noise.

    This helped a great deal. I was now not under the stress and strain of his unbearable outbursts, and could proceed to think more clearly about how to help him. I developed a better relationship with him, and had more emotional reserves of my own to be able to extend more positive statements to him.

    I called in his family and the counselor. His family was unable to provide much help, since they were the source of the problem. The family refused the school's offer of placing him in the student assistance process.

    Now we are at the point where he rarely cries. He still has many, many issues.

    Your student's crying is really an SOS. While it is important to respond to that SOS, it is equally important to preserve the right of your other students to learn, and your right to teach without disruption.
     
  2. txmomteacher2

    txmomteacher2 Connoisseur

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    Apr 5, 2014

    I am really beginning to think this child is bipolar. The crying had been escalating in recent weeks. Friday he was like a totally different kid. His crying was a whimper. Even when I pulled him aside and talked to him about it. There was no outbursts. He just did what I said. He didn't act like a baby, he didn't want to hold my hand. He was a typical kindergartener. Now all I can hope for is this cycle last until the end of the year.
     
  3. mnbishop

    mnbishop New Member

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    Apr 5, 2014

    Hang in there!

    The light at the end of the tunnel is approaching. I agree that keeping this student moving and giving him a purpose may help. Perhaps a simple positive reinforcement chart would help. Maybe every half hour without crying he earns a sticker. The stickers could lead up to a simple desired award that only takes a few minutes.

    I teach second grade and I just send any kids who cry obnoxiously out into the pod. I tell them to get a drink and come in when they are done. Usually the humiliation of older students seeing them cry like babies helps and they stop. Not sure how that would work for this kinder student.
     
  4. Loveslabs

    Loveslabs Companion

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    Apr 6, 2014

    I thought you said pond, not pod! Lol!!
     
  5. ScienceEd

    ScienceEd Companion

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    Apr 7, 2014

    I was responding to the suggestion that you should "pretend that the kid doesn't exist".

    I would rather lean towards the other suggestions made: send the kid on an errand (wash face, deliver message to office, etc) to distract him from crying, or suggest moving the child to half a day if he can't be distracted from crying.

    I'm glad to hear he was doing better on Friday. hope it all works out.
     
  6. iteachbx

    iteachbx Enthusiast

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    Apr 9, 2014


    I totally disagree. It's not natural for a child in elementary school to cry every time they want something. Crying should not be a form of communication. This child needs to learn that crying is not an acceptable way for him to get what he wants. He needs to be taught other ways to deal with his issues- and that's not completely a classroom teacher's job.

    I would bring this up to the mother for sure (although I'm sure you have already.) Is there a school based support team with a psychologist or guidance counselor that could do some observations in the classroom? At my school they would probably do that and then possibly make arrangements with mom to have the child go to some type of counseling program outside school if needed or have the child picked up by the guidance counselor for counseling in school if the parents are on board. It definitely helps. If not I would definitely address the issues with an administrator since these issues seem to be hindering your teaching as well as this child's learning.

    As far as the short term, I would try to consistent when dealing with him. I understand you're frustrated and trying a bunch of different things. Pick one thing now and stick to it so he knows what will happen when he's crying and defiant. Personally I would probably say "I'm not going to speak with you when you're crying. If you need to tell me something or want to speak with me you can write me a message or come speak with me when you calm down." After that I'd ignore him. You've told him what he needs to do discuss his wants/needs. If he chooses not to do it, part of the reason might be he's testing you to see if crying will get him the attention he wants. I equate it to a child who acts out for attention. He might not know how to get positive attention. Tell him what he needs to do to get your positive attention. Also, when he's not crying and is being cooperative definitely give him lots of praise. Maybe even start some sort of behavior sheet or sticker chart where he can work to earn a reward for the periods or days or whatever that he can use his words and follow directions without becoming so upset.

    Good luck, hang in there, not too much time left!
     
  7. iteachbx

    iteachbx Enthusiast

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    Apr 9, 2014

    I had a bipolar child last year- and she was similar to what you described when she was younger. She is in extensive counseling so the crying was much less severe in 3rd grade- only for few minutes, pretty rare and not disruptive to others- she kind of got upset, cried it out, and it was over. But I know when she was younger it was more like what you described- all the time, loud, disruptive and for hours on end. Sometimes she didn't even know why she was so upset. Is the child on any medication for any reason? Maybe that could be causing the moodiness?
     

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