I have a kiddo in class who likes to make horrible sounds during songs in circle time. It’s hard to describe, but it’s almost like a quacking sound… on key, on beat, but very loudly. This is the second year I’ve had this little guy and he started this habit a few months ago. It’s disruptive and I nearly always have to have him removed from circle because he is hurting ears of other kids and drowning out my singing. It’s not a sensory processing thing, it’s an intentional defiant thing. He’s super bright, loves circle time, has friends, etc. What I’ve tried so far: charts for good circle times, reports home about circle time with consistent home reinforcement, allowing the choice of not coming to circle time, nonverbal reminders, seating near the teacher, seating far from the teacher, seating near a preferred playmate, seating away from preferred playmates, preteaching, preteaching the other children about what to do when someone is bother you, asking the children to ignore the noise, having this guy “practice” singing the songs while his friends play in centers/outside (which he easily and contentedly does). When I ignore the behavior, it does seem to disappear about 25% of the time. The bulk of the time though it becomes so loud that it cannot be ignored. Any attention to the behavior is sure to skyrocket it. And then he won’t happily leave circle. When he’s bent on disrupting circle, he’s just going to do it. I know I'm gong to get the answer "attention seeking" but.... I can't ignore... so I'm at a loss. I’ve never encountered this before, and I feel I can’t help solve this problem because I haven’t been able to understand WHY. What purpose is this behavior serving? I wish it didn’t matter, but it probably does--this little guy is my son. Although he does do the quacking during singing time for other teachers as well. . Have you seen this behavior before? Any insight? My proverbial “bag of tricks” is empty!:help:
Can he be moved to another teachers class? He might be seeking your attention because he's sharing mom with other kids...
Is he in a class with the right age group? Can you tell him if he continues the behavior he will have to stay home (or with a sitter)? When my DD was in my class, I explained to the other children that she was my DD, and sometimes needed something extra from me. That way, I could give her some extra attention, and not one kid had a problem with it. I think that sometimes sharing a mom is really hard.
Anything new going on at home that would change this little mans life a bit? Expecting new baby? Moving? Dad changing jobs/times worked?
So I think you asked the key question yourself - what purpose is the behavior serving? I think that's the key to figuring out next steps. Unfortunately there's no default answer for that kind of behavior - it doesn't always mean one thing, and could be everything from sensory stimulation to avoidance of activity during circle time or not liking the person he's sitting next to. So, are there any other behaviors that are problematic? Wondering if there are any more clues to solving the puzzle. Is he developmentally on level - academically (if relevant), speech, motor, social, etc.?
From my experience, if he is only doing it at circle time, he doesn't like sharing his mom with the group. Putting myself in your shoes, if it was my child, I would have no problem taking away something he really likes to do, like recess until it stops. This has always worked in my class with persistent problem behaviors. Get tough mom. I really doesn't matter why he is doing it. What matters is that it's not appropriate or polite and it needs to end.
I might suggest a different approach. Offer one thing he can do instead of that. Like he can have a table that he is allowed to color at. Not with markers, just crayons. He can't go anywhere else, or do anything else. But he has the choice. Circle appropriately or the table. This actually is a good way to get kids eventually involved appropriately, it can take months, but it usually works. In the meantime, your son is doing something acceptable and following a limit and you are able to do what you do. If children ask, just tell them, this is what he needs to do right now to keep his body in control, and he is making a good choice. Have him help you with deciding what the alternative choice should be.
Okay, maybe I read this post wrong, but this little guy is NOT yours correct?! If you have used your bag of tricks let me ask you this. Have you talked to the parents about the behavior? I am not a teacher that runs to the parent immediately when there is an issue, but if you have run out of your bag of tricks, then you have spent time and energy trying to solve it on your own. Perhaps now's the time to get parents involved? I would definatley let them know that he *can* sing the songs when he chooses to or even another time, but he is choosing to NOT do them when he is directed to. Simply put ~ he's not following directions.
It seems to be attention seeking. It may not be logical, but the way it is explained seems to be that. I might consider some natural consequences. Something that happens immediately after circle time that can be used. Outside time? Computer time? Favorite toy? Free choice? Something. Make it clear, privately to your child ahead of time, specifically what the behavior is that is unacceptable and what you expect his behavior to be instead. Have him be able to tell you this expectation. Then explain that if he does this behavior during circle, that is HIS choice, and he is CHOOSING the consequence by doing so. As soon as circle is over and kids move on to the next thing, whatever it is he wants to do, he cannot do. In fact he may just have to stay at circle for a while till he's ready to accept that the won't get to do the desired activity and will have to settle for a less desired one. And it needs to be clear why that is so. Hopefully have him tell you why he lost his privilege. But then, drop it. No more discussion. Unless he is doing the correct thing. This will take a while, for sure. Be sure to tell him, right before the potential behavior to "make a good choice." But also lots of positive attention if he does make an appropriate choice.
