Are you the social scheduler?

Discussion in 'Teacher Time Out' started by jen12, Apr 3, 2011.

  1. jen12

    jen12 Devotee

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    Apr 3, 2011

    In your group of friends, family, etc. are you the one who arranges social get-togethers or would you rather someone else do it?

    I try to do it sometimes so that it doesn't all fall on one person, but it drives me up the wall. People don't respond to invitations and then show up anyway, or there's not a date everyone can make it, or someone doesn't want to go with the flow...I'm just done with it. The thing that upsets me the most is the non-response. I'd settle for a "maybe" or an "I'll think about it," but just ignoring emails or invitations is outright rude.
     
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  3. Ima Teacher

    Ima Teacher Maven

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    Apr 3, 2011

    None of us are particularly social. Every now and then somebody will put something together at the last minute, and that's about it. It's never the same person who does it, though.
     
  4. JustMe

    JustMe Virtuoso

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    I don't really socialize. Besides the standard holiday get-togethers, we don't often have family gatherings. And I'm terribly uncomfortable at social events, say a faculty party and things of that nature, so I tend to avoid things like that. I've only "hosted" one event at my house and that was a super casual thing for my brother graduating and only the immediate family was there (mom, step-dad, sisters, brothers).
     
  5. PCdiva

    PCdiva Connoisseur

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    I am totally the Social Scheduler!

    I either do it myself or it doesn't get done!

    I like to organize game nights for my group of friends, about 6-8 couples and a few kids. So we don't really go out as much. In addition we celebrate Thanksgiving Eve which is always at my house, Christmas Eve Eve which we rotate houses, Superbowl is always at the same house.

    During the summer I have the pool open, so everyone is always welcome! A few of my friends barely go home all summer, which I love!


    I am always the organizer for vacations, going to see shows, and getting everyone to do races and other fun things together too! We have a great time, and I am glad to do it!
     
  6. EdEd

    EdEd Aficionado

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    Apr 3, 2011

    Funny - I was just thinking about this earlier today! I am actually fairly against social scheduling - my life tends to be so planned out most of the time, I like being spontaneous. I am probably one of those people that either doesn't respond or puts off the decision. I've had friends before that have tried to play the social organizer function, and it hasn't gone over well :). I do understand the need since everyone is busy, but sometimes it's just nice to have an open schedule and be able to go with the flow!
     
  7. TiffanyL

    TiffanyL Cohort

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    Apr 3, 2011

    Oh Major, do tell......do tell. How do you work a room? I have to say that I am very comfortable working the room at a work event...but not at a standard social event with just friends or acquaintances.

    So, please share your tips!!
     
  8. TiffanyL

    TiffanyL Cohort

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    Apr 3, 2011

    NOOOO....not at all. Seriously...I was being completely serious....LOL. I really was. I work a crowd great when it is work related because I am confident in that realm. Outside of work, though, not so much and it really bugs me!!

    BTW, isn't it funny how through written word we cannot tell if someone is being sarcastic or not??
     
  9. waterfall

    waterfall Virtuoso

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    I agree with this! I am the "scheduler" a lot of times with my friends from home (I live far away from my hometown). I can't stand it when people are so wishy-washy with plans, especially since we're all in our hometown so rarely. I feel like a lot of times when other people try to make plans, they just fall through or they don't organize them well enough. I actually think "maybe" is a really rude response unless there is actually a good reason (although I'd have to agree no response at all is quite rude!). I also hate when people say "as of right now, I can make it." To me that implies "if I can't find something better to do, I'll come." Either you already have plans or you don't! We're all young without children- so its not like family emergencies come up or they have to check on a babysitter, etc. My best friend is the same way with dependability, she just doesn't like to make plans because she hates to make all the decisions (that's fine with me- I understand that!). I think one of the reasons she is my best friend is that she is so dependable and I can always count on her.

    At school I'm okay with being more "spontaneous" because we're all around all the time- its not like at home where we're there for maybe a week every few months. I don't feel the need to plan Friday happy hour on Tuesday or anything haha. I also feel like around here there are a lot more people that are dependable and will step up to make plans themselves- I guess its just a personality difference!
     
  10. Ms. I

    Ms. I Maven

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    Apr 3, 2011

    I'm not that social either. One other friend & I may arrange to get together, but I don't have a reason to plan any parties. If I had a reason to, I wouldn't mind being the scheduler once in a while.
     
  11. EdEd

    EdEd Aficionado

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    Apr 4, 2011

    waterfall - that's funny - we may not be friends in real life :). My friends tend to be people that will randomly get together - and when I say random, I'm talking, "Hey - let's go to the beach this weekend. Can you be ready in 15 minutes?" :). People who schedule things days/weeks in advance I tend to not hang out with as much - not because I don't want to - but because they usually, well, have plans!

    Of course, there are exceptions for me - like you mentioned, being back in my hometown when there really isn't a lot of time, or if there is a special event like a fundraiser or play that requires tickets in advance.
     
  12. Aliceacc

    Aliceacc Multitudinous

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    Apr 4, 2011

    There's no one person in any of our crowds.

    There are 2 other families on our block with whom we socialize a bit-- it tends to be pretty spontaneous. So we went out for a fancy dinner in December because Peter and I were going, and we ran into Vivian shoveling snow. (A sledding expedition started off the same way--Vivian hadn't been sledding since she was a kid, and I swear I can still hear her screaming as she went down that hill!!!) We had a LOT of late nights last summer next door, simply because we got to talking, they invited Vivian and her husband to join us, and we ended up hanging out around the picnic table with a bottle (or2) of wine. (Their kids are still real young. Mine are old enough that if they woke up and looked for us, the open back door would tell them where to find us.)

    In our other social crowds it tends to work the same way; someone will call or email an invite for dinner or something, but it's not one person or couple in particular.
     

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