Are You Better Off than Your Parents?

Discussion in 'Teacher Time Out' started by Ms. I, Aug 21, 2008.

  1. Ms. I

    Ms. I Maven

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    Do you think you're better off than your parents when they were your age? How about right now? (Careerwise, family, etc.)

    I 1st want to say, parents should want a better life for their kids than what they had. I give all credit of my success to God & my parents!

    I say yes & no. Also, it depends on what you mean by better. (For example, some people will think having kids by a certain age is good, but others may not be interested in having kids at all.)

    Education - I have a much higher education than BOTH of my parents or most of my relatives for that matter.

    Job - I've already had a better job than my parents & w/ my education, I will have a much better job. My mom always had good clerical jobs. My dad had blue-collar jobs.

    Getting married - My mom was married at the age I am now & I don't think I'll be getting married this yr! It's the 1st & only marriage for my parents & I expect to only be married once too. I'm their only child.

    Having kids - I have 3 yrs to be the same as my mom.

    Owning own home - My mom beat me by A LOT in this area. But things are so much more expensive now.

    Life Experiences - My dad was in the Army, so I'd say he's had more life experiences than me. My parents raised me to have a rather sheltered life. I'm an only child, so I guess they were a little overprotective.

    CURRENTLY, my parents are doing better than me, but that will change very soon! :)
     
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  3. SpecialPreskoo

    SpecialPreskoo Moderator

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    To begin with my mom was a stay at home mom when I was a kid. She didn't have to work until I was a teen. My husband and I both work and we barely make ends meet. He even has side jobs he does. They have money in savings and we don't. They own their home, we rent.

    My parents are better off that I am BIG TIME and I'm the one with the masters degree. GO FIGURE!
     
  4. jw13

    jw13 Groupie

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    Education - I have a better education than my father, but the same as my mother. Although, that will change in the future when I get my masters.

    Job - Well, I would say I am worse off than my parents were because I stayed home and am now an aide...not too high up on the career ladder.

    Getting married - My parents were divorced at my age...bitterly(sp?). I am happily married, hopefully for a very long time. :)

    Having kids - I had my children later than my parents. However, I think I am able to provide more for them, than my parents were able to provide me. My mom had three children total and I am stopping at two.

    Owning own home - I am so behind my parents. I am in my second home. My first had 735sq. ft. I now live in a townhome...more sq. footage, but still not quite where we want to be. My mom is still living in same big house she bought when she was my age.

    Life Experiences - I don't think this is comparible to my parents. We each had such different experiences, good and bad. I would say though that I think I have learned more from mine and have made better decisions because of that.
     
  5. CanadianTeacher

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    I am better off than my parents on all fronts.

    Education - Neither went to university or even past high school.

    Financially/Jobs - My parents were still struggling when they were my age and we are finally seeing an end to the struggle.

    Retirement - My parents did not implement any kind of plan and now they are retired (my dad anyway, mom stayed home) and seem to work harder than ever before. We both have pension plans and won't need to worry.

    Family - I did not grew up in a happy home. Both my parents had their own issues that made them slightly bitter in some respects and they didn't deal with my teenage years very well. We have broken that cycle and are very in tune with our kids and each other. Home is a happy and stable place.

    Life experience - I have made it a point to learn from the mistakes I make and even from the mistakes others make. My parents seem to relive the same situations over and over (mainly regarding mistakes they made raising me and regarding family relationships, I see them repeating with my sisters and then their grandchildren).

    That being said, I have learned over time to appreciate my parents for who they are and for what they are able to give (emotionally). Although I had major resentments growing up, I can now easily take them as they come and so we have a good relationship now (but I could never live with them again!)
     
  6. MissFroggy

    MissFroggy Aficionado

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    My parents are divorced... so it's really different for both of them.

    Education - I have a higher education than either of my parents, though my parents both went to better schools. My mom went to Harvard (then dropped out) and my Dad went to Northwestern. I went to a state school.

    Job - My dad has a better job than me but works a lot more. He has his own business and works 70-80 hour weeks, even at 65! However, he also takes long vacations and they travel a lot. My mom is a home health care worker and makes very little money. She never finished school and has very few skills. She also had an inheritance and didn't work for many, many years, but now that money is gone and she's in the po' house.

    Getting married - I am not married. I am 31. By 31, I was already 3 years old and my dad was on his third marriage! (Already divorced my mom and onto wife #3.)

    Having kids - My dad has EIGHT kids. 2 from his first marriage, me, then 5 kids from his current marriage. My mom has 2 kids, me, and then my brother, who she had with my step-dad (now divorced again.)

    Owning own home - My dad lives in the house he grew up in, but he expanded it in a major way. It's large and is on a large lot. My dad also has about 25 rental properties so he totally has beat me. My mom has owned homes, but now lives in an apartment. My apartment is nicer than hers in some ways (urban vs. suburban) but she has more amenities, like a pool, workout room, covered parking.

    Life Experiences - My mom has traveled all over the world, Asia, Europe, etc. I don't think my dad has done any international travel. I have been outside the country a couple times. My dad stays local mostly. My mom had a lot of huge experiences as a child, like meeting celebrities and things like that because her father was a record producer. I have never had experiences like that. My dad lived a relatively normal life, so I think I have had more experiences than him, but not my mom.

    CURRENTLY-- I think I am doing better than my mom, but not my dad. My mom works SO hard and is getting older (62) she has almost no retirement and can't stop working any time soon. I also think I make more money than she does! [/FONT][/SIZE][/COLOR][/QUOTE]
     
  7. Peachyness

    Peachyness Virtuoso

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    Education - Neither one of my parents has a Bachelors degree

    Job - My parents had jobs, but my mom was mostly a stay at home mom. My dad had job after job after job because he was never happy. As a result, my brother and I were forced to move from city to city.

    Getting married - Married, but earlier than when my dad did and later than my mom (dad much older than my mom)

    Having kids - Parents had two kids. My mom was 22 I believe. We plan to NEVER have kids. Not in our plans.

    Owning own home - I own a house. Parents never did as we were always moving.

    Life Experiences - My dad traveled around the world a lot more than I did, my mom traveled a little. I feel I am catching up, though and have done some traveling now.

    CURRENTLY-- Overall, I have it better off than both of my parents.
     
  8. corps2005

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    Education - I am definitely doing better in this area, BUT it is because of my parents that I have college and grad school under my belt. If they had not of motivated me and kept encouraging me when I wanted to quit, I would not be where I am today. :)

    Job - Yes, I do have to say my job is better, but that isn't to say that my parents didn't work harder. My Dad used to own a pest control company, but it went out of business because of competition. Then, he had to drive a garbage truck for years. It was good money, but it was dirty and hard labor. My Mom stayed at home while we were younger, but then went to work as the person who weighs the trash when you go into a landfill. Her office was not air conditioned and she had to work 7am to 8 pm Monday-Saturday. :(

    Getting married - My Mom and Dad married young, around 18 I believe. I waited quite a while to get married (24) because my Mom didn't want me to marry young. My Dad passed away by that time, but he told me not to get married before college.

    Having kids - My parents already had two kids by this point in time. My husband and I don't have any, but I think it's because I'm finishing up my Master's degree. I heard that people who get advanced degrees often end up having kids later in life.

    Owning own home - Once again, my parents beat me in this department, but money was very tight for them. My husband and I lived in an apartment for 3 years before buying a house last year.

    Life Experiences - I'm only 28, so I'd have to say my parents have had more life experience than me when they were my age. They had a hard life and some trials in the marriage as well. That, and having kids early.

    I'd have to say I am doing better than my parents, but it's because of them that I am. My Dad passed away and life has been very hard for my Mom. She's remarried, but is now considered well below the poverty level. On top of that, she can't work because of an injured arm. She's 57 and has no life insurance, a home that she owns, no retirement money either, and her sons never call her anymore. I help where and when I can, and hate seeing her live like this. Hopefully, our situation improves in a few years, and I can send her more money, so she can live like she is supposed to. :)
     
  9. Ima Teacher

    Ima Teacher Maven

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    Things are really kind of different, but I'll give it a go.

    Education - Both parents have high school degrees, and my mom took one class in college--when I started grad school. I have a masters degree and six hours toward a second masters.

    Job - My mom hasn't worked an outside the home job since she was 23 years old. Dad is a retired from the coal business. He had worked up to a pretty "high up" position in the company by the time he retired. Dad's net pay in the 80's/90's was more than my current gross pay.

    Getting married - When my parents married, Mom was 19 and Dad was 28. I was 30.

    Having kids - Mom was 24 when she had me. I'm the only child. I'm 37, and I don't have children.

    Owning own home - My parents bought a house about 4 years into their marriage, so they were about 23/32 at the time. I bought my house at age 29, before I married.

    Life Experiences - Dad lived more places and traveled more than Mom did. However, they took me all kinds of places when I was still living at home.

    Both of my parents have medical issues, and Dad wrecked his truck a few weeks ago. I've been having to take them to their appointments, help them with their errands, and basically do a lot of stuff for them. I told them that they did all that for me until I moved out to college at 17, and I've only been having to do "running" for them the last couple of years, so I owe them a good 15 years. :lol:
     
  10. tabasco4sale

    tabasco4sale Rookie

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    I'm better off than my mom in that I went to college and more knowledgeable than she'll ever be.

    On the down side, my knowledge amounts to absolutely no practical use. At my age my mom was already making big bucks, whereas I have yet to hold a stable job.

    Notice how small my world is.
     
  11. BethMI

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    No, I don't think I'm better off.

    Education/Career-My parents were smarter, so able to get careers in a "better" (more pay and more respect) field-medicine. Dad is a Dr, mom's a nurse. But b/c of it, they were able to put us through college and grad school (forever grateful!) and have a great childhood-wonderful experiences-vacations, etc. We have yet to do that for our son.

    Getting married-my parents met late in life for their generation, they married at 33 and 30. I married at 26, hubby 27.

    Kids-parents had me at 34 and 31, brother at 37 and 34. We had our son at 29.

    Home-B/c of their great careers, they were able to purchase a wonderful house in a great school district about the age I did (so I guess we're tied there). They are still in their house. They had theirs paid off a whole lot earlier than we will.



    My high school history teacher told us, "You will never live as well as your parents live." Great motivator, huh? That has always stuck with me. :(
     
  12. Jem

    Jem Aficionado

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    Education - My dad and I both graduated from U of M's school of ed, so we're totally even on that front. My mom has gone on to get a couple of advanced degrees, as she's a principal (masters) and has a some kind of technology endorsement.

    Job - It's funny, but I never think of levels when I think of sucess in the workplace. I just think 'are they happy?'. My mom is very happy, as am I, so I would put us as equals, even though I'm a teacher and she's a principal. My dad is as happy as you can be working in an office, although I know he can't wait to retire. But I would say he's very successful in his happiness, so we're all equal on this front. But at my age, neither of them could find a job. There were no teaching jobs for my dad (sound familiar?), so he finally went into insurance. My mom got a very specific degree in recreation, and couldn't find a job, either. So they both settled when they were my age, and made squat in terms of money. Erik is pulling as much as my dad did just a few years ago, although I took a HUGE paycut for this job and am not getting very far in terms of salary.

    Getting married - They got married a bit earlier (around 21, I think). I was 24. Pretty close. They are still happily married, as are we.

    Having kids - My mom had me, the first, at 28. I'm 26, and we're thinking kids in a few years, so it will be pretty close!

    Owning own home - I think we're pretty even again. Homes are MUCH more expensive out here in N. CA than they were in urban Grand Rapids, MI, but we make a lot more. So we'll probably be able to afford something similar to the tiny fixer-upper my parents bought for 1/25 of the price. ;)

    Life Experiences - Erik and I have traveled way more. I went to Europe with my choir in middle school, and he's done Semester at Sea and backpacked across Australia. I know my parents haven't left the country, and I don't think his parents have, either. But in terms of in-country travel, friends and just general memories, we all live our life to the fullest.

    My parents are amazing, and they are my biggest role models. If I can live a life as great and full as they have, I will be extremely lucky!!
     
  13. Ms. I

    Ms. I Maven

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    Aug 22, 2008

    What a thing to say. That would make ME want to work harder to surpass them or at least be just like them, I don't care if both of my parents are surgeons.
     
  14. JustMe

    JustMe Virtuoso

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    Aug 22, 2008

    I am better off than my parents, and I hate it. :(
     
  15. BethMI

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    Yeah, it has ticked me off and made me work hard since then. That is the ONLY thing I remember from his class. I don't even remember what kind of history it was.
     
  16. smalltowngal

    smalltowngal Multitudinous

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    Aug 23, 2008

    Education-I am getting my masters. My dad only has his bachelors and mom only did a few semesters of college and then a paralegal school.

    Jobs-I would say that my mom was better off. She held the same job for many years right up until her passing. Dad's disabled now so he can't work, but back when he could, he couldn't hold a job down for very long because he was always running his mouth. I will say that when I get a job in my district I will be better off than my mom was, even after working 10+ years at her job.

    Marriage-Both my parents were married previously. They married each other when they were 32 and 30. I was married at 21 and hubby was 28.

    Children-They each had children from their first marriage. I think mom was 24 when she had my sister, 32 when she had me. I was 22 when I had DD.

    Owning own home-My parents owned a home when I was born, and then built a home that my dad still lives in. After my mom died, he could have paid it off and not had any major bills, but he wasn't smart with the money. We have owned our home for 2 years. So I would say they were better off in this department.

    Life Experiences-They had definitely traveled more than me and DH have. I hope to change that soon so that I can give DD the experiences that I didn't have.
     
  17. catnfiddle

    catnfiddle Moderator

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    In all of this, bear in mind that I'm currently 36.

    Education: Dad has two graduate degrees and started a PhD program before he realized that he'd have to live on the school's main campus for a semester to complete it. Mom didn't realize until she was 50 that she needed 30 extra credits beyond her BS to keep her teaching job and did it FAST.
    I have a BA and about 15 credits while hoping to start a masters program over the summer. Hubby has an MS in geophysics.

    Job: Dad taught most of my life while holding down a second job until he hit maximum salary, which somehow was the same time my younger brother graduated college. Mom was a SAHM until my brother was in preschool, and then she subbed until about the same time Dad hit max.
    I just landed my first teaching job this month after three years of subbing. Hubby ran his own internet server throughout the 90s and sold it a few years ago so he could return to school. He's held his first science job for over a year.

    Getting married: Parents got married when they were 21 and celebrated their 39th anniversary last week.
    Hubby and I celebrated our second anniversary in June. First marriage for both.

    Having kids: Parents have two adult children and one granddaughter courtesy of my brother and SIL.
    We are happy being parents to our guinea pigs and cat. LOTS of pitter pattering little feet.

    Owning own home: Parents have been homeowners since I was six months old, but Grampa paid the mortgage while Dad went back to school for his teaching certificate.
    We're waiting until next fall to start looking for a home.

    Life experiences: My dad went to England as a teenager, traveled up and down the east coast with the family in tow (I tried to hide under a blanket in the back seat) and took Mom on a cruise of Europe.
    I went to Israel as a teenager and dragged up and down the east coast. Hubby traveled much more extensively before he met me, but was good enough to take me to Alaska for our honeymoon.
     
  18. MissWull

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    Aug 23, 2008

    Hmmmm, I don't know. My parents were living an apartment with my older sister at the age I am (26). I am living with my husband in their house! So freedom wise, no I'm not...but money-wise, yes...because they already had a child to pay for along with rent and all the bills. My husband and I only pay our bills, no rent...until next summer when we move out...and no kids!
    Also, I think my husband and I have better job opportunities than they did. I say this because back then college wasn't a big thing, so my parents never went. They just landed jobs at big companies when they graduated high school...they have moved way up and make great money now...but when they were my age, it's not like that's what they wanted to do.

    So I guess it kinda evens itself out... :)
     
  19. chemteach55

    chemteach55 Connoisseur

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    Aug 23, 2008

    Actually I am about the same as my parents and I think it is because of similar jobs.

    Education--My mom has a master's degree in education and I have a bachlor's in food science but I hold a certificate from an alt cert program. My dad has a degree in engineering and my husband has the same degree.

    Job--My mom stayed home with me until I was in high school and I stayed home until my youngest was in kindergarten. My mom retired this year at the age of 62. My dad worked for a chemical company for 35 years and then retired the year I went back to work. He then played "Grandpa" and brought my kids to doctor and dentist appointments and took care of my children afterschool so that I could go to work. Last summer when my youngest was entering high school, he announced he was going back to work because he would not be needed as much with the kids and was afraid he would be bored. So my dad turned 70 this year and went back to work.

    Marriage--My husband and I got married when I was 21 and he was 24. My mom was 21 and my dad was 27 when they got married. My parents are still married and my husband and I have been married for 22 years.

    Having Kids--I was an only child (not by my parent's choice--they could not have any more after I was born due to medical problems). I have 3 children. My first was born when I was 23 and my mom was 23 when she had me.

    Owning Home--My parents are living in their 4th home. We are living in our 2nd home. Our house is about 3200 sq ft on a 1 1/2 acre lot. We are about equal in where we are house wise. This is a large house but not our dream house. My parents built their dream house about 10 years ago. We will probably build another home in the next 5 years.

    Life Experiences--My mom has traveled abroad extensively but I have not but this is by choice. I have traveled with my parents lots in this country.
     
  20. 3littlemonkeys

    3littlemonkeys Comrade

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    Aug 23, 2008

    Nope. Not by a long shot, on any front.

    I guess I'll add more info, although it depresses me to see it all spelled out like this!

    Education: I'm 30 and working on my teaching credential. My mom had hers right after college, and my dad was done with his B.S. and working in aerospace years before he hit 30.

    Job: my mom was a teacher at a public school earning a good salary at this point in her life...after she had me, she was a SAHM for years. My dad had a very good position first with Hughes Aircraft and then TRW. I am an hourly employee at a private school and can't make ends meet.

    Marriage: my parents married at age 29 and are still married. They've had a very good, solid marriage. I married at 23 after we'd already had two kids...we have not had a good marriage and are currently living in different states and things are not headed in a good direction, I'm just postponing doing anything about it till I can support the kids on my own.

    Having kids: my parents had me when they were 33 and well established, financially, then much later had my 2 sisters. I got pg in college. Had my first at 21, barely made it through college (but I did!), then had #2 at 23 and #3 at 25...and then had my tubes tied because as great as these kids are, I can NOT afford to be cranking them out every 2 yrs, lol!

    Owning home: my parents had a house by now, and a few years ago sold their house they'd owned for 28 yrs and bought a nicer one outright in a cheaper area with lots left over to put in the bank. I am renting a tiny 2-bedroom place and share a bedroom with my 4 y/o daughter.

    Life experiences: My mom had been to Europe by now. She and my dad went on ski trips and various vacations. I have been struggling to keep my head above water since becoming a parent. Our time at Ft. Campbell was an experience my parents never had, to be sure, but I am thinking the Europe trip kinda trumps raising 2 preschool-aged boys while pg with kid #3 while dh is in Iraq. ;)

    So I really don't like the comparison...I try to just keep telling myself that better times are sure to be ahead.
     
  21. 3littlemonkeys

    3littlemonkeys Comrade

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    Aug 23, 2008

    My mom told me (when I'd just had my first child and was taking a semester off from college, because I had to work full-time to support him and college was just too much on top of that) that she didn't think I'd ever graduate from college. She was dead serious; she didn't think I'd go back at all, and if I somehow managed to, didn't think I'd be able to handle it.

    Well, I did. And reminded her of that comment around the time of my graduation, too. She tried to play it off like she was just trying to motivate me to prove her wrong...but did later admit that she really thought that me having a kid was the end of the college degree idea.
     

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