Apathetic guardians

Discussion in 'General Education' started by YoungTeacherGuy, Jan 4, 2024.

  1. YoungTeacherGuy

    YoungTeacherGuy Phenom

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    Jan 4, 2024

    Greetings!
    I’ve got a TOUGH group this year. No one is violent nor does anyone elope or refuse to come inside the classroom (some of my colleagues have the aforementioned issues), but I have 4 boys who are SO INCREDIBLY ACTIVE! Everyone has a wobble stool instead of a regular chair. I allow them to stand up while doing work, I do frequent transitions, and I give a lot of brain breaks. We are always moving and grooving.

    Anyway, whenever I’ve tried to bring up concerns to these 4 parents, only 1 out of 4 seems to genuinely care. The other 3 avoid me at dismissal (all first graders get picked up at a particular gate and teachers wait with them until their adult comes) or don’t respond to my messages and phone calls. They also didn’t show up to parent-teacher conferences.

    It seems like each year, parents get less and less interested and involved in their child’s education.

    Anyone else experiencing this? I’m not the type of teacher who wants to share negative things everyday, but there are definitely times when I need to bring up a concern to a parent. Heck, there are even times when I want to share GOOD news, but can’t.
     
    Tyler B. likes this.
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  3. TeacherNY

    TeacherNY Maven

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    Jan 5, 2024

    It used to be only 1 or 2 kids had parents who didn't care. Now it's harder to find the ones that give a :crossmark::!?::!!:
     
  4. Tyler B.

    Tyler B. Groupie

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    Having 4 students on the edge of the bell curve can really affect the whole class. Some parents think that schools want to drug their kids with ADHD meds and that Covid vaccines have microchips in them.

    I think it's essential that you document these students' struggles with attention/implusivity. You can send reports home via email and text so you have a record of having informed the parents. If possible, look for positive comments to "sandwich" the other news.
     
  5. YoungTeacherGuy

    YoungTeacherGuy Phenom

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    The thing that is also frustrating is that whenever anyone from the PBIS team (admin, counselor, psychologist, etc.) come to my room for an unannounced visit, they always leave great feedback and say that the boys seem to be thriving. However, once they’re outside and on their own (at recess), all bets are off. The yard duty supervisors complain to me nearly every single day about their behavior. I put them in a social skills group with the behaviorist, which has helped a bit.

    I keep reminding myself that they were placed with me for a reason and that they have made great strides in terms of behavior, but let me tell you—by Friday, I am completely depleted!
     
  6. TeacherNY

    TeacherNY Maven

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    I agree that emailing is better than calling because you then have a documented trail of communication. If phone calls are necessary in extreme circumstances I would try to have someone else on the team with you on speaker (if the parents even bother to answer the phone) so you have a witness to the conversation and the parent can't put words in your mouth. I don't really trust those types of parents so I CC all emails to my supervisor. It also helps if the parent sees the CC so they know you aren't the only person at the school who is involved with sharing the information.
     
  7. viola_x_wittrockiana

    viola_x_wittrockiana Cohort

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    Jan 6, 2024

    Yup. Having a trail keeps your buns covered. I had one mom last year who claimed to be blindsided about her daughter when I finally got her on the phone after I'd emailed multiple times to the address the school had on file. She then blamed me for sending emails to an address she doesn't check. I suggested she change the email on file with the office @@.
    I've known multiple parents to block the school's number.
     
  8. YoungTeacherGuy

    YoungTeacherGuy Phenom

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    Oh yes—as a former admin, I can attest to the fact that parents DO indeed block the school number or will simply say, “Do not call me!”

    Once (when I was still the AP), I had to drive a child home with a temp of 103! I told mom that the nurse had called and called, and she flat out said that she blocked our number!
     
  9. catnfiddle

    catnfiddle Moderator

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    Jan 8, 2024

    Okay, that is dangerous!
    I work with high schoolers, and a lot of times the parents are hard to reach or simply say that their kid is my problem, not theirs (especially if the student is 18 or older). The idea that parents are doing this with their elementary-aged children is horrific.
     
  10. TeacherNY

    TeacherNY Maven

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    We had a parent who's mailbox was full for a month. I mean, how hard is it to clean out your voicemail? It seems like she was avoiding calls so if her mailbox was full you couldn't even leave a message.
     
  11. txmomteacher2

    txmomteacher2 Enthusiast

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    Jan 12, 2024

    Last year we had a student who had been sick for a few days. So the parent had missed work. Well on the 3rd or 4th day she sent him back to school still sick, still fever. Of course we called her and said come get your kid. She flat out refused said he wasn't sick and that we needed to keep him. So our admin told her if you aren't here in 20 minutes we are caling CPS. Of course she showed up, LOUDLY told us we were stupid called us all names, including the two teachers who had her son. Then proceeded to call us out on Facebook. Mind you this all happened last year, she is still harboring a grudge because this week on another post on facebook that was not related but still having to do with the school district she reminded us all that the entire school district are idiots.
     

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