an organized newlywed

Discussion in 'Teacher Time Out' started by MuckeyBusiness, Jul 16, 2012.

  1. MuckeyBusiness

    MuckeyBusiness Companion

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    Jul 16, 2012

    So i'm not married yet but my brain is starting to think about getting two lives organized to one. Anyone have ideas or things that work for you. We will be living in an apartment after we get married and i'm just worried about planning meals, keeping schedules organized and all that
     
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  3. agdamity

    agdamity Fanatic

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    Jul 16, 2012

    I plan all meals as my husband never has any idea what he wants to eat. I also get home earlier, so I cook, but he will usually do clean up. I also do all the grocery shopping because he is horrible at it! :) He is in charge of laundry. We didn't really plan this out ahead of time, we just kind of figured out our strengths after we married and moved in together and the division of labor developed naturally. At various times, we have each picked up more of the slack (I cleaned more when he was in grad school, he cleaned more when I was in grad school and pregnant). For schedules, we have a calendar on the fridge to write down various events.
     
  4. Ima Teacher

    Ima Teacher Maven

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    Jul 16, 2012

    We had a calendar in the office with big boxes for each day. We'd each write our events on there. We'd plan meals a week in advance. On Sunday afternoons we'd plan the meals for the week and then go to the store for fresh meat and other perishable items. (Other shopping was done monthly.)
     
  5. e6789

    e6789 Rookie

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    Jul 17, 2012

    This is awesome! My bf is in his mid 20s and acts like he is 5! He will cook, but never clean up! It's so frustrating because he uses the maximum amount of dishes possible. I have already learned not to take him grocery shopping. He can't leave the store without blowing $200.
     
  6. Sarge

    Sarge Enthusiast

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    Jul 17, 2012

    My wife says she never takes me because I'm too big to fit in the cart.
     
  7. KateL

    KateL Habitué

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    Jul 17, 2012

    It's all about communication. You have to be able to tell each other how you want the apartment to look, and how clean you want it to be. You should start these discussions now so it's not a big shock after the wedding if you have different living styles.

    You also need to talk about how you manage money, and where you are going to spend the holidays. Many people assume that things will go on as they've always done them, but that doesn't work if you both assume that!
     
  8. smalltowngal

    smalltowngal Multitudinous

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    Jul 17, 2012

    :rofl:
     
  9. Aliceacc

    Aliceacc Multitudinous

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    Jul 17, 2012

    Have a serious chat about finances.

    Discuss who will pay the bills, which accounts will be in whose name, how much you'll save, retirement-- the whole 9 yards.

    Consider, too, a will. Once you're a family, you'll want stuff in writing. Something else I've mentioned before is a health care proxy.
     
  10. Dollas

    Dollas New Member

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    Nov 20, 2012

    I think there is nothing serious or such stuff to thing about that how will be the proceedings after life with your life partner, or how you will manage it. I think it will be totally depend on your natures, personallity and understanding, or how you both want to go thr


    assisted living gold coast
     
    Last edited: Nov 29, 2012
  11. lucybelle

    lucybelle Connoisseur

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    Nov 20, 2012

    When my novio moved in with me it actually went very very smoothly. To this date we have yet to have a real argument. We had already worked out finance issues so we never had a disagreement with that.

    I had to learn to be less of a weirdo. When I lived alone it was fine for me to be particular, but with another person I learned to let a lot of things go. Like my novio always stacks up dirty dishes so then they get dirty on both sides. It drives me crazy. But it's not a fight worth fighting. Because really, it's just not that big of a deal.

    I guess what I'm saying is-- pick your battles.:thumb:
     
  12. Em_Catz

    Em_Catz Devotee

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    Nov 20, 2012

    I'm where you are now with my awesome, DB, so CONGRATS and kudos for finding someone you want to marry and settle down with. It's no easy feat!

    I hope my post doesn't come off as negative, but I'm one of those hard-headed people that learns from mistakes. Maybe some of the things my ex-boyfriend and I disagreed about will help provide you two with some good talking points -

    1. Who pays for what? (He paid all the mortgage for our home which was great, however it used up his entire check which meant I had to pay for EVERYTHING else. Gas for both cars, vet & grooming for our dog, groceries, going out, replacement parts for his military uniforms, our cell phone bills, his guitar lessons, toiletries for the house and a small portion of utilities.)

    2. Ground rules for having guests visit (ie: one of his co-workers was going through a divorce and needed a place to stay. i wasn't comfortable but I said okay. the co-worker turned out to be a playboy and had several women coming in and out of our house. NOT COOL!!! However, my ex didn't want to kick him out b/c it would've made things awkward for him at work)

    3. Are you going to call or leave a note for one another if you're out late? (i was notoriously bad at remembering to do that)

    4. Establish your own personal space to chill, cool down after an argument, work on special assignments, etc (we had 4 bedrooms. 1 we shared, 1 was his office and the other 2 were completely bare. I never set them up as my own personal space, so when we'd argue, I'd go in his office to cool down and he'd get even madder)

    5. How will you handle dinner? (he expected me to cook whenever I didn't have school, like summer, winter break or holidays. Current DB and I have agree we will switch off and if it's "my night" and I don't feel like cooking, it's expected I purchase enough prepared food for us both.
     
  13. czacza

    czacza Multitudinous

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    Nov 20, 2012

    After life with your life partner?
     

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