Akward Phone Conversation...

Discussion in 'Teacher Time Out' started by Maithal, Mar 11, 2008.

  1. Maithal

    Maithal Cohort

    Joined:
    Aug 20, 2005
    Messages:
    712
    Likes Received:
    0

    Mar 11, 2008

    Akward Phone Conversation

    So, I've been getting to know this guy I met online. He lives 2.5 hours away. He's the same culture as me (as I'm not Christian) so it's nice in a way b/c I can see myself marrying within my culture/religion (although I'm not opposed to others either). Anyway, we started talking on email a few weeks ago and then through yahoo instant messanger 2 times. He seems genuinely interested in me and asks a lot of questions and our conversation seems to flow on IM.

    Yesterday he called me and we talked on the phone. Let me just say it was quite akward. He kept laughing for everything I said(and maybe even what he said). I wonder if he was nervous, but i couldn't tell. It was just plain weird. We did talk for a little while, about my work and his and a little about our families, but it was so weird that I didn't even ask him many questions (I mean I must have asked a few), but I don't know about this. I know I should give him a chance as he seems nice (on paper, lol), but I couldn't get over his voice and the way he kept laughing. His voice was not so deep deep like most guys(if that even makes sense). He also called at 10pm which is kinda late to call when you are calling a person for the first time, not that I wasn't up (usually up till 11-11:30). Maybe I'm trying to find faults with him, lol. I wish I could ask him why he kept talking on the phone, but I can't do that (that's what my mom told me to say, lol!).

    Last night I had a dream that he was "stalking" me by calling me too much. It was scary!

    Anyway, what do you think? A friend of mine who is engaged tsaid that I should still give him a chance b/c in the beggining things may be akward. Who knows.

    What do you all think?
     
  2.  
  3. smalltowngal

    smalltowngal Multitudinous

    Joined:
    Jan 2, 2007
    Messages:
    17,362
    Likes Received:
    46

    Mar 11, 2008

    I think it might have been nerves that made him laugh. It was the first time talking to each other. It's easy to come across as confident over the internet, but when you actually talk to the person where you can hear their voice, its completely different. I say give him a chance.
     
  4. teacherintexas

    teacherintexas Maven

    Joined:
    Jul 7, 2005
    Messages:
    5,280
    Likes Received:
    748

    Mar 11, 2008

    My husband and I were set up on a blind date. We exhanged a few emails first, then talked on the phone. During our first conversation on the phone, my husband swore I didn't talk for the first twenty minutes, but he hung in there with me. Our first date was in April and we married that August.
     
  5. cMcD

    cMcD Groupie

    Joined:
    Aug 3, 2007
    Messages:
    1,214
    Likes Received:
    0

    Mar 11, 2008

    He could have been nervous. I was set up with my first boyfriend through some friends. We started chatting through e-mails then AIM. The first time we talked on the phone it was kind of awkward. I would give him another chance. Maybe his voice will be a little deeper next time when he is less tense. Let us know how it goes!
     
  6. RainStorm

    RainStorm Phenom

    Joined:
    Aug 23, 2005
    Messages:
    4,326
    Likes Received:
    768

    Mar 11, 2008

    I've met a lot of people (both male and female) online over the years, and honestly I've found that the first impression is usually the correct one.

    Maybe he was nervous....but maybe that is how he talks and interacts (which might be why he is looking for someone in his life.)

    If you talk to him again, and you still get this vibe, trust your instincts.
     
  7. Eddie

    Eddie Companion

    Joined:
    Jul 13, 2005
    Messages:
    130
    Likes Received:
    0

    Mar 11, 2008

    Don't give up on him yet. Email more and talk via phone some more. Give it a little time before you go hunting for faults.
    Best wishes.
     
  8. Yank7

    Yank7 Habitué

    Joined:
    Aug 24, 2007
    Messages:
    870
    Likes Received:
    0

    Mar 11, 2008

    Common Sense tells you to be careful. Speak to him a few more times on the phone. How much do you really know about him? If you desire to meet,do so in a very public place,and make sure your family or friends are kept informed about what is happening. Good Luck.
     
  9. silverspoon65

    silverspoon65 Enthusiast

    Joined:
    Aug 3, 2007
    Messages:
    2,403
    Likes Received:
    1

    Mar 11, 2008

    I agree with Rainstorm, that the first impression is usually correct. But then again, it won't hurt to talk to him on the phone a few more times and see if it gets better. It wouldn't even hurt to meet him in a public place eventually and see if he is different in person. You might even just become friends, but then if you meet his circle of friends, you might be able to meet more guys of your culture and religion.
     
  10. Maithal

    Maithal Cohort

    Joined:
    Aug 20, 2005
    Messages:
    712
    Likes Received:
    0

    Mar 11, 2008

    Thanks for all your insight! I really appreciate it! I still haven't heard from him, but part of me doesn't want to. Lol, then I do in another sense just to know where things stand.

    I was thinking if he does email me to say our conversation went well, that I could always say that it was nice to talk to someone w/the same background as me, but that it was still a little akward because we are just getting to know each other. Then I would say, but I hope to continue to get to know him.

    I would only write this if he emails me. Any other suggestions?
     
  11. Turtle321

    Turtle321 Companion

    Joined:
    Jan 22, 2007
    Messages:
    126
    Likes Received:
    0

    Mar 11, 2008

    I agree.

    I am worried for you in the sense that he is asking YOU a LOT of questions. Why? Are you giving him a lot of personal info? Be careful. As for his laughing....he may have been nervous. (Or thinking devious thoughts?) Keep us posted on what's happening!
     
  12. MissFrizzle

    MissFrizzle Virtuoso

    Joined:
    Mar 10, 2006
    Messages:
    6,439
    Likes Received:
    0

    Mar 11, 2008

    Are you sure he is the age he says he is?


    I agree though, that making the phone call is often very difficult, and most guys don't do well on the phone. He is probably just as nervous as you were, but it came out as laughing.

    Take the conversation ( and any future conversations) for what they are. Don't read into anything, and let things progress as they may.
     
  13. Hoot Owl

    Hoot Owl Aficionado

    Joined:
    Jan 15, 2008
    Messages:
    3,888
    Likes Received:
    0

    Mar 12, 2008

    I'd proceed with extreme caution.

    He could have been high on drugs. There's a lot of creepy people out there, a lot of great people, too.

    If you were my daughter, I'd have him checked out by the FBI or see if he had a police record. It would be nice if you could check out his bank account, see how much credit card debt he has, research his family tree, see if he has a life insurance policy... I'm partially kidding, but do be safe.
     
  14. rainyday

    rainyday Rookie

    Joined:
    Jan 17, 2005
    Messages:
    61
    Likes Received:
    0

    Mar 12, 2008

    When I read this I thought nerves on his part. But if I were you, I would listen to your inner voice and trust your gut!
     
  15. Peachyness

    Peachyness Virtuoso

    Joined:
    Jul 14, 2006
    Messages:
    6,181
    Likes Received:
    1

    Mar 12, 2008

    He could also be socially awkward. He may not have the normal social skills. I know this. I'm a total social dweeb. I also do weird little things when I'm very nervous and talking to people I don't really know. Like talk too fast or too much, laugh too much, etc.
     
  16. MrsC

    MrsC Multitudinous

    Joined:
    Aug 8, 2005
    Messages:
    14,034
    Likes Received:
    1,853

    Mar 12, 2008

    I'm not good on the phone, particularly with people I don't know well--I would hate for someone to pass judgement about my character because of it. If you are interested in him, give it some time and get to know each other better.
     
  17. MissWull

    MissWull Cohort

    Joined:
    Oct 25, 2006
    Messages:
    721
    Likes Received:
    0

    Mar 12, 2008

    I would say give it another shot. Maybe he was just nervous that if he did say something you would think he was weird with what it was, so just to be safe...laugh. At least you wouldn't think he was a stiff! hehe.
     
  18. BioAngel

    BioAngel Science Teacher - Grades 3-6

    Joined:
    Oct 11, 2007
    Messages:
    3,644
    Likes Received:
    108

    Mar 13, 2008

    Considering that I met my fiance online as well, I think it's an excellent way of meeting new people :) Sean and I talked online daily during the 2004 election since we both liked the same candidate and we met through a Christian site so we did have that in common.

    Take what ever you need to feel comfortable and if he's a true man he'll understand that and not push for more. I wouldn't worry about stalking yet, but do be careful--- try not to give too many details about your personal info (full name, where you work, your home address, birthday, etc) until you feel that you can trust him better.

    The voice and the laughing thing might have easily been nerves. Sean does that too and while I wouldn't call him completely normal :)P) he is a great guy. So I wouldn't want you to pass up on a great opportunity either!
     
  19. jw13

    jw13 Groupie

    Joined:
    Feb 13, 2008
    Messages:
    1,494
    Likes Received:
    1

    Mar 13, 2008

    I'm sorry...Are we related?:confused:
     
  20. Peachyness

    Peachyness Virtuoso

    Joined:
    Jul 14, 2006
    Messages:
    6,181
    Likes Received:
    1

    Mar 13, 2008


    :lol::lol::lol::lol::lol::lol::lol::lol::lol::lol:


    Whoops. sorry, guess I'm a little nervous.

    :lol::lol::lol::lol::lol::lol::lol::lol::lol:
     
  21. TeacherSandra

    TeacherSandra Enthusiast

    Joined:
    Oct 29, 2006
    Messages:
    2,305
    Likes Received:
    0

    Mar 13, 2008

    maybe you have your answer~part of you doesn't want to hear from him~
    trust your instinct. Don't give him much info on yourself either; and if you do decide to meet him; meet him in a very public place. Keep in touch. We care! :love:
     
  22. Maithal

    Maithal Cohort

    Joined:
    Aug 20, 2005
    Messages:
    712
    Likes Received:
    0

    Mar 14, 2008

    Thanks so much for all your replies. I agree, he could have just been nervous. I haven't talk to him again on the phone, but I decided to still give him a chance. You never know. We've been emailing back and forth since the phone call, and I did mention in email that I believe it can take time to fully feel comfortable talking to someone and that at first it can be akward. He said it was nice to chat on the phone earlier this week and that he'd call either this weekend or soon. I'm leaving that ball in his court. He does seem nice on paper, lol, as he seems to want to get to know and he also answers my questions of him. So, we'll see what happens.

    However, I'm proceeding in caution. If my next phone conversation doesn't go well, I'll assess the situation and go from there. For now, I'm going to leave it as it is, give him a chance, and see what happens.

    Thanks for all your advice (even my non atoz friends, lol thought he might have been nervous as well). I especially appreciate knowing that you all care! :)

    I'll continue to keep you updated.
     

Share This Page

Members Online Now

  1. VAMath,
  2. Ima Teacher
Total: 410 (members: 3, guests: 379, robots: 28)
test