Hello. I am a middle school teacher having some problems with a young man in my gifted English class. He has given me some problems throughout the school year so far, and I have tried many ways to stop the behaviors in class (lunch detention, removing him from class, written assignments, parent notification, etc.) He is the typical class clown. I wrote a referral on him earlier this year, but administration ignored it saying they were too busy to address it at the time... I think they had other motives as mom has harrassed them in the past too. I have been teaching for 3 years now and have never had a problem such as this one. For this post I will call the student, Bubba, for privacy and security purposes; I do not need Mom getting on me anymore then she already has! Last Wednesday, 2 days before winter break Bubba came to class 6th and 7th period (I have them for 2 blocks, one for reading, the other for writing). I gave Bubba and 3 other boys warnings as they came into class, as they were causing problems the day before. I gave them each a form they would have to fill out and bring home to mom and dad if they caused more problems on this day. As a class we began to work on our persuasive essay brainstorms in class. Bubba had his head down on his desk facing away from me at the podium and overhead. I went over and clapped lightly next to his ear and said his name to wake him up from his sleep (I never touch a student to wake them up, pat them on the back, etc. I know how many problems it might bring about!). Bubba ignored me and would not face me or return to the assignment (but was now awake). I collect Elmos and decided to try and wake him up with some energy and class participation (the whole class was dragging). I had the class particpating with Hokey Pokey Elmo and tryied to get him motivated to work in class (he is an attention seeker, and I thought some attention might get him involved and ready to go). Bubba continued to ignore me in class. I then walked away from Bubba and allowed him to have his space. About 5 minutes later, Bubba raises his head and shouts to the class, "Can't you all keep it down in here? I'm trying to sleep!". I asked Bubba to step out of class and go to another teacher's room to fill out the form (how was I to ignore this comment). Bubba did so. On his form though he wrote a very smart response to his parents mocking me. I asked Bubba to step out in the hall. While in the hall I asked what was the purpose of what he had wrote and told him it was disresepectful. He shrugged and ignored me some more. I told him I would see what I would do and let him know. I did not want to get caught up in the moment with my anger and make a bad decision. Later on in the afternoon I called Bubba's mom. From the moment she answered the phone she seemed really mad and short. I asked her if Bubba had mentioned anything that happened during English class and she said no, he did not say anything (of course he wouldn't, he was in trouble!) I then explained to her that Bubba had been causing problems in class throughout the week, and I had tried to give him a 2nd chance before calling home. I told her I gave him a form at the start of class as a warning and explained he would have to fill it out if any problems occured in class. I then told her how he was sleeping and ignoring class instructions and how I tried to wake him up. Finally, I told her about the comment he shouted, sending him to another teacher to do the note home, and the response he wrote. She was short to me, never really speaking or asking questions and hung up the phone. I thought it was all odd but left it alone and went on home for the night. The next morning my administrator calls me to tell me the mom has requested a conference with him and myself. He asked if I knew what the conference was about, and I told him the story. According to his schedule we can not meet until mid-January. I worried I might have hurt Bubba and decided to call home again and see if she would want to meet with me, my team members, or have a conference call to solve any issues immediatley for the best interest of Bubba. I explained to her that if I had done something to Bubba (such as embarass him or hurt his feelings) I would want to fix it ASAP, so he would be comfortable in class for the next 2 weeks after break. She said no, she could wait and it was something that needed to be done in person. My adminstrator said he would allow her to vent in the conference and say what she felt she needed to, even if it hurts my feelings. He told me he would stop it when he felt it was enough. I am not sure how to approach this conference and what my rights are as a teacher. I do not want to be harassed throughout a conference in the middle of the work day. I worry how much I can defend myself. I worry I should have a represenative on my behalf, and if the school has my back (as they say they do). I know I did nothing wrong and have replayed the situation over and over again in my mind and can find no wrong doing. I never swore at him, called him a name, etc. He might have been embarassed, but I tried to fix it and apologize, but was refused. I have never been in this situation and need help and advice. What did I do wrong? What do I say? How do I not go into the conference angry? What are my rights? Please help. This mom has caused problems with her older son last year with another team. She argued with them about fair grades and poor Johnny did not know what the expectations were and the assignments were laid out. For other information. Nothing other then the phone call has happened due to his comment. He has had no other consequences. I was told if I have any other problems with him in class I am not to deal with it, but call the administrators.