A new school and (possibly) having a baby - at a loss about what to do.

Discussion in 'General Education' started by tinkertot, Aug 1, 2013.

  1. tinkertot

    tinkertot Rookie

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    Aug 1, 2013

    I just got an amazing job at my dream school after teaching two years in a very tough school in a very tough area. It's the kind of school that I could see myself staying at for the majority of my teaching career. I'll be teaching lower school science (science to 2nd, 3rd, and 4th grade) - it's seen as a 'special', like art or gym or technology. The school community is incredibly supportive and welcoming, and very family oriented.

    My husband and I have wanted to start a family for several years now but have been putting it off until I could secure a job at a better school - which I now have. Now that this has happened, I'm incredibly worried about getting pregnant the first year working there and that it might jeopardize my position. We're hoping to get pregnant this September or October so that I'd be due in June or July. School ends for students the first week of June, so I'd miss the subsequent end of the year meetings (but am hoping I could Skype in); no subs would need to be hired as the students would already be gone. Obviously July would work better, but that would only leave us a 1 month window to try to conceive. I wouldn't qualify for FMLA because I haven't been working there for a year, even though I was hired in May - my official start date isn't until the end of August, so my job technically wouldn't be secure. However, I would have 15 short term disability days and 10 sick days that I could use in June if I needed to.

    We're very torn about what to do. Obviously I'd be working my heart out and doing the absolute very best teaching I could possibly do, but I'd hate for the school to think that I wasn't putting work first and decide to not renew my contract the following year. We could put it off until next year, but it would be a big disappointment.

    Has anyone had any experience with this situation? I'd love to hear your thoughts, advice, or suggestions.
     
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  3. DizneeTeachR

    DizneeTeachR Virtuoso

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    Aug 1, 2013

    You know the cliché best laid plans...
    I was hired and then found out I was pg. Wasn't a big deal really. Luckily I had subbed at the school so the staff was helpful. But I had the baby early so that plan didn't work out. After having baby hard to go back. I took unpaid time off because I didn't meet FMLA requirements either. My best advice find out in your contract your maternity leave. I know this sounds horrible but the contract I signed (before I knew I was pg) had nothing about maternity leave. It was cause for more stress. I was very frustrated.

    This is yours and hubby's decision...
     
  4. GemStone

    GemStone Habitué

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    Aug 1, 2013

    As a teacher, I can say there is never a perfect time to have a baby. And even if you plan to conceive in September or October, that does not mean you will. It could take longer.

    I can't speak for your school. Teachers have babies all the time here, though, and it doesn't reflect badly on them at all. They deliver during the school year all the time and have a long-term sub for 6 weeks.

    Only you can say if your school will hold it against you. But keep in mind that they probably have several teachers every year giving birth. It won't be new for them.

    As a mom, I can say I had a child while teaching and 15 years later, he was worth it. The circumstances at work are such a miniscule thing when I look back through his life and forward to his future.
     
  5. 2ndTimeAround

    2ndTimeAround Phenom

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    Aug 1, 2013

    I think it is just good form to work at least a year before getting pregnant. Plus, with something so performance heavy like teaching, I think it would be better for the school to see what you're really like. Pregnancy can do a number on people and it might make your work suffer a bit. I wouldn't want my boss' first impression of me to be how I was when I was pregnant. Sometimes I was fatigued or just didn't feel well. I couldn't have been "on" every day like a teacher needs to be.
     
  6. Jem

    Jem Aficionado

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    Aug 1, 2013

    I agree with 2ndTime in the fatigue area. My pregnancy hit me hard-morning sickness, necessary naps during the day, extreme sciatic nerve pain. I was at 50% most of those 9 months. Luckily I wasn't teaching-I had the luxery of laying in a chaise to do my job. I always recommend ladies think about the pregnancy as well as the delivery.
     
  7. DizneeTeachR

    DizneeTeachR Virtuoso

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    Aug 1, 2013

    I will say some don't have problems with Morning sickness either..blessed I didn't have that.
    I would take a nap when I got home...
     
  8. BioAngel

    BioAngel Science Teacher - Grades 3-6

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    Aug 1, 2013

    I'm starting my 4th year at my current school- in the prior years I was always scared to get pregnant and deliver during the school year. Now though I honestly don't care- I know I will have a lot of work to take care of if it happens but I see starting my family as more important and if I need to leave school then that's what I have to do for my family.
     
  9. agdamity

    agdamity Fanatic

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    Aug 1, 2013

    It took me two years to get pregnant each time (and that was with fertility treatments). If you feel you are ready to start trying, then that is up to you and your husband. It doesn't always happen quickly. You won't know how pregnancy will impact your performance until you are actually pregnant. Everybody has different experiences.
     
  10. Caesar753

    Caesar753 Multitudinous

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    Aug 1, 2013

    I think that it would be best to wait a year before planning to get pregnant. Planning on having a baby at the end of your second year (or even partway through it) seems like a much better idea than being pregnant all through your first year, at least to me.

    I also agree with others who have said that you don't always get pregnant on your schedule, so be prepared for that.
     
  11. TamiJ

    TamiJ Virtuoso

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    Aug 1, 2013

    If it were me, I would absolutely try to wait, if possible. I would really want to dedicate myself and prove myself at this school. Likewise, you will be putting the pregnancy first once that comes, and it would make more sense to wait until it wasn´t your first year at this school.
     
  12. Toy_03

    Toy_03 Companion

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    Aug 1, 2013

    I agree with everybody else that you should wait a year. Get comfortable with the school first then after one year, try to have a baby.
    I got pregnant at the end very of my first year (last year)...after completing my first year of teaching
     

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