Teaching makes me sick?

Discussion in 'Secondary Education' started by LukeofAppalachi, Nov 11, 2012.

  1. TeacherGroupie

    TeacherGroupie Moderator

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    Nov 12, 2012

    Luke, it's also quite possible that you're an introvert. Remarkably many teachers are. If you find yourself needing to leave school at the end of the day and Just Be Alone, For Gosh Sakes, that's perfectly normal.
     
  2. YoungTeacherGuy

    YoungTeacherGuy Aficionado

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    Nov 12, 2012

    I wholeheartedly agree!
     
  3. Peachyness

    Peachyness Virtuoso

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    Nov 12, 2012

    I wouldn't necessarily jump at the chance at taking meds until you have tried other methods first. THEN, I would start to look into them.

    First, give it more time.

    I was an awesome sub and my second student teaching assignment went really well. Yet, when I was hired to teach my first class, I also had a tough time. I also felt sick (nervous stomach), dry mouth, felt unsure, etc. I had taught before (as a sub and student teaching) and did my field work through my university courses and yet I felt so scared! I think it was just so much to take in. My own class that I was now in charge of. I had assessments to now worry about, parents, admins, coworkers, I had to worry about making sure my kinders had the right bus information and got them on the right bus at the end of the day, lunch numbers had to be learned, etc etc. Things that I didn't even think about when I student taught or subbed. Anyways, after a couple of months, I was on a roll and LOVED that class. By March I began to pray that time would just stand still. I didn't want the year to end.

    I'm a HUGE introvert, very shy, and have always had low self esteem. I think part of these things played a part when I was first hired. Now, I'm still those things but I now have the experience under my belt. In fact, my coworkers would have never thought that I consider myself shy and an introvert. Hmmm, maybe I'm not anymore?
     
  4. Peregrin5

    Peregrin5 Phenom

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    Nov 12, 2012

    This is EXACTLY how I felt last year and even the beginning of this year. :blush:

    I think a lot of it is new teacher jitters. You'll do fine. Just stick with it Luke.
     
  5. Cobalt_Waves

    Cobalt_Waves Rookie

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    Nov 15, 2012

    I will never forget the first time I student taught. My heart rate was probably dangerously high and I was sweating bullets. A few months later I came to accept that I had an anxiety disorder. I have taken Celexa off and on ever since and it helps A LOT. The side effects are annoying, and I don't like to take it anymore than I have to, but it helps just knowing it is there. It helps just knowing that my anxiety CAN be greatly diminished by simply taking a pill. I have gotten through a lot of difficult periods of my life thanks to it.
    I can now teach with very little anxiety as long as I am not in a particularly trying situation... Then of course I am anxious like anyone else would be.
     
  6. LukeofAppalachi

    LukeofAppalachi Rookie

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    Nov 19, 2012

    Thanks for the suggestion Cobalt...Hmm...I may look around for such things, as I do believe it may be tied to my previous OCD, GAD tendencies (I was once prescribed Flouvoxamine, but never really got to taking it very often, perhaps it's time to try these things again.)

    I know teaching comes with anxiety and stress, but what I am feeling just seems...excessive, and I really really want to enjoy my job and I don't want the kids to suffer for my own anxiety problems...I don't know if Thailand carries that particular medicine, but I may be able to find a substitute.

    Also...even if I wanted to leave teaching, I don't have much a choice. In Thailand, if you're white, you teach (I think they even have laws barring foreigners from being employed in much else). Most importantly, my (soon-to-be) fiancee lives here, and it is simply not a choice to return home at this point to seek alternative employment.
     
  7. TamiJ

    TamiJ Virtuoso

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    Nov 19, 2012

    I really think you need to allow yourself time. In the beginning, teaching is very hard. You are learning how to balance everything and most of the challenges do not include the actual teaching but everything else. Stress and anxiety are normal, but you do need to find a balance and find what works for you in your classroom. Hw long have you been in Thailand? As someone who is teaching abroad I know that being in a foreign country adds a whole different level to the experience, and feeling isolated and lonely can be part of it. Do you think this might be true for you as well? Learning to live and function in a different country is overwhelming in itself.
     
  8. LukeofAppalachi

    LukeofAppalachi Rookie

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    Nov 20, 2012

    Hey Tami, I have been in Thailand for about 7 months now, so I have somewhat adjusted, but there is a lot to learn in this culture. I do think over time, the stress will reduce, but I also believe being here in another country and teaching (both stressful ventures) has caused my OCD/GAD, which I had believed to have become dormant, to flare up once more...but that is a topic for a different forum (and likely--a completely different website). Today we had a field trip to the Bangkok Planetarium, so it was pretty stress free! :) :) :) we foreign teachers let the Thai teacher "run the show" for the day. Anyways, I will continue to keep trudging along; (while trying my best of course!) we have atoms and elements up this week on the agenda.
     
  9. TamiJ

    TamiJ Virtuoso

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    Nov 20, 2012

    This is my fourth year in Mexico. The first year was an adventure and all new, fun and exciting. Near the end of the first year was when cultural differences began to get annoying. Even though I speak Spanish (better now than in my first year) I felt like it was so hard to communicate everything I wanted to. After the adventure part of it wears off, you're left with the reality of being so far away from everything that's comfortable to you. Of course I'm only in Mexico, and it's not so different from the U.S. I imagine the cultural differences you're experiencing are to a much greater level than I ever experienced. Just keep at it, stay positive, and give yourself time. Best of luck to you.
     
  10. LukeofAppalachi

    LukeofAppalachi Rookie

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    Nov 20, 2012

    Alright...I guess one could say I caved. Took my first Xanax today before the school day. Many may not respect me much for this decision, but the pain inside was just too much, and my stress was causing quite a bit of strain on my mine and my fiancee's relationship. She just couldn't understand how being around such "cute kids" could stress anyone out and said that being anxious about teaching them was just "strange" (Having confidence issues as it is, this didn't help much). Anyways, the xanax seems to be helping, as I'm not completely dreading the day today. I was even so wrapped up in my last class (my most challenging one!) that I was a bit sad to hear the bell ring! (which rarely happens). I don't plan on this medicine to be long-term, as I plan to start trying alternatives such as meditation and a good workout routine. I think they will help...but I just needed something a little more fast-acting to sustain me while I work out the other techniques. I really do appreciate all the support on here. I hope once I work all my issues out, I can contribute to others who may come into the same situations as me.
     
  11. Peregrin5

    Peregrin5 Phenom

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    Nov 20, 2012

    If it works and you need it to be an effective teacher, and there is no long term harm, go for it. I don't think anyone would lose their respect for you for making that decision.

    Just try not to become reliant on medication to teach. There may be consequences to that. Keep trying to build up your classroom management and teaching strategies. Best of luck!
     
  12. SCTeachInTX

    SCTeachInTX Fanatic

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    Nov 21, 2012

    Maybe... If teaching is making you physically ill, you should research other options. Of course, TRY the suggestions of the persons on this board. But if all else fails, start looking for other options for your future. Life is too short to be unhappy or feel anxious every single day. Happiness in the profession that you do everyday is also key to your positive mental health. There is no shame in being a career changer. And there is always someone clamoring to take your position. All the best. There are options if you feel that teaching is not healthy for you.
     
  13. Dollas

    Dollas New Member

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    Nov 21, 2012

    If teaching really makes you sick, or its frustrate you when think about things to do in class room. Then you need to find out some other career or profession for youself as it does not suits your nature.

    assisted living gold coast
     
    Last edited: Nov 29, 2012
  14. Furthuron

    Furthuron Companion

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    Nov 26, 2012

    This may sound silly, but when I started substitute teaching before I got my credential, I sort of created a mental "persona" that I played the part of. I was just me (and an anxious me with little confidence), but the character of "Mrs. P" was strong, solid, consistent, smart, and capable, so I pretended to be her, like playing a part in a movie. It kind of goes with the "fake it till you make it" mentality, but it worked for me. As time goes on, you won't have to fake it because you'll have your teacher persona solidly in place.
     
  15. Poodle15

    Poodle15 Companion

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    Nov 27, 2012

    The fact that you are looking for help and advice and are will to listen to those who have the experience to help says that you care and want to teach. So maybe it sounds a bit weird and cliche, but... I believe in you.

    A close friend of mine moved to Japan from Texas. He's been there about 7 years now, is married and just had a daughter. He's happy and can't imagine his life any other way. But at first he was devastated. He'd been obsessed with all things Japanese since junior high and took Japanese in high school. He thought he was prepared but he suffered quite a bit in the transition for a couple of years.

    If you really want it, you can do it. If it helps, I'm only observing in my first year of college and every time I walk into that classroom I'm terrified. Still. You're not alone. Don't give up. Okay, cliches over. ;)
     
  16. LukeofAppalachi

    LukeofAppalachi Rookie

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    Dec 2, 2012

    Hehh...after reading up on Benzo's I don't think I will be using them much longer, as research suggests they may cause an early onset of Alzheimer's. I am also taking Lexapro, but I don't think it has kicked in yet...I'm not sure what to do...I am still trying to find the root of the fear...I am starting to think it is a fear of losing control, or of not having it in the first place (even if I do indeed have control, the fear is still there). Maybe I can find a Therapist in America that I can do phone session's with. If my school didn't threaten to fine people 1,600$ for leaving mid-year, I may just resign to get myself back together...

    If nothing else, Christmas break is just a few weeks away, perhaps I can go to some Buddhist Temple and meditate for a few days straight! (jk)

    Oh, and one more thing, many of you mentioned mentor teachers...I am just afraid that if I admit all of these anxieties and obsessions to them, they will begin to view me as incompetent and unfit to be here (which, whether or not that is true, I don't necessarily want them thinking that).

    Other than that, the actual teaching seems to be coming along, the kids are coming up on their midterms and I think they'll be ready. They seem to be warming up to me as well......but this...this...abominable, despicable anxiety still remains.
     
  17. LukeofAppalachi

    LukeofAppalachi Rookie

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    Dec 12, 2012

    Sorry for the double-post, but I just wanted to let everyone know that I am beginning to feel much better. Whether it's the Lexapro is finally kicking in or I am just getting used to the new school (likely it is a combination of the two), things are getting better. Just got a new iPad for an early Christmas gift and got the app. GradebookPro (I think it will help a lot as far as record-keeping goes). Anyways, sorry again for the double post--just wanted to give an update. Even for us with OCD/GAD, there is hope for us as teachers! :)
     

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