Parents and Lunch in 4th Grade

Discussion in 'Fourth Grade' started by Ms_Peters, Aug 9, 2011.

  1. Ms_Peters

    Ms_Peters New Member

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    Aug 9, 2011

    I have a question.... Do you think parents should still be visiting their child during lunch in the 4th grade??? I am concerned... My husband wants to go to our son's school and have lunch with him. He works from home so he does spend plenty of time with him. I am really concerned about his social skills, he has hard time making friends... does this make it worst???

    Thanks.... :eek::eek::eek:
     
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  3. MissCeliaB

    MissCeliaB Aficionado

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    Aug 9, 2011

    Maybe if he limits it to special occasions or once or twice a month. A better option might be asking the teacher to be a guest reader, or come teach about some hobby or interest he has that the kids may be interested in.
     
  4. waterfall

    waterfall Maven

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    Aug 9, 2011

    We had parents of 5th graders that would come in during lunch occasionally. I guess it does just depend on the kid though. How does your son feel about it? You could even ask his teacher if other parents ever come in and what she thinks would happen.
     
  5. smalltowngal

    smalltowngal Multitudinous

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    My daughter is in 2nd grade and I plan on eating lunch with her a few times this year...and I'll probably do it up until she's in 5th grade. If it's just a few times a year, I don't see a big deal.
     
  6. etcetera83

    etcetera83 Cohort

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    I teach 4th grade and I have several parents come in throughout the year to eat lunch with their child. I usually let the child pick 2 friends to sit with them at the end of the lunch table.
     
  7. jcar03

    jcar03 Companion

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    This must be a new thing because I see policies on it while I'm researching schools. I never ever saw a parent in the lunch room when I was in school.
     
  8. EdEd

    EdEd Aficionado

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    I think it's fine depending on the child. If the child thinks it's okay, it actually could help tremendously with social skills if your husband can help facilitate interaction between him and others during lunch. I'd be inclined to say go for it - even up to once/week, but at the discretion of your son...
     
  9. Tasha

    Tasha Phenom

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    I think it is fine as long as your son is ok with it. As far as making friends, I think at this age it is really helps to start getting involved in activities and making friends that way. It might be music lessons, sports, or art classes, just something that tends to have kids in smaller groups with the same interests.
     
  10. iteachbx

    iteachbx Enthusiast

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    I've never heard of it. I definitely wouldn't want to make it a regular thing, especially with a child who has some social difficulties. Other children are much less likely to want to socialize with him, or even feel comfortable socializing with him with an adult around. I've seen it happen with students who have a 1 to 1 paraprofessional that works with them in the classroom. It works out much better when the para helps from a distance rather than sits next to the child everyday.
     
  11. Beth2004

    Beth2004 Maven

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    I've taught 3rd, 4th, and 5th grade and I've never seen any parents come to school to have lunch with their children. I would definitely ask the teacher if that often happens in 4th grade at your son's school because if it doesn't, it could single him out in a negative way. I agree with MissCeliaB that asking to be a guest reader or going in to do something fun with the class might be a better idea.
     
  12. Aliceacc

    Aliceacc Multitudinous

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    It's absolutely unheard of around here. My 8 year old daughter would die of embarassment.

    Admittedly, that may be a regional thing.
     
  13. MrsC

    MrsC Multitudinous

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    We don't have a cafeteria--students eat in their classrooms--but I've never heard of a parent coming to have lunch with their child. We do, frequently, have parents pick up their children to take them out for lunch for a special occasion, might something like this be an option?
     
  14. iloveschool

    iloveschool Companion

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    Parents come eat with their kids all the time at my school. I can not believe there are schools where parents do not eat lunch with their kids. I am not saying it is a bad thing- just I have never heard of it not being done. We have 250 in elementary and I bet there is one parent almost everyday. It might be for a birthday or special day, but we usually have at least one. I think it would be fine for your husband to go eat with your son.
     
  15. Sarge

    Sarge Enthusiast

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    I think lunch with a class of 4th graders would do a lot to improve your husband's social skills. It definitely helped mine. However, I'm not sure if he would make very many friends unless he helped the janitor after lunch.
     
  16. swansong1

    swansong1 Virtuoso

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    I think it's wonderful that the parent comes to eat lunch with the child, even in 4th grade. At the schools I have worked at, most of the children, even 5th graders are really excited when their parent comes. I'm actually surprised at the number of negative posts on this issue. Like Alice said, maybe it is a regional thing,
     
  17. Beth2004

    Beth2004 Maven

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    I also agree that it might be a regional thing because I'm surprised by how many people responded saying parents visiting for lunch is normal. As a student myself and now as a teacher for the last 6 years, I've never seen parents join their kids for lunch at school.
     
  18. Joy

    Joy Cohort

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    I actually think that it could end up helping him make some more friends. Whenever I see parents sitting with their kid and eating lunch at the school, alot of other kids are trying to talk with the parent. That could end up helping him get to know some of the kids a little better. If his dad wants to be that involved in his life, I think that is far more important and lasting than socializing with the other kids at lunch. Not every kid needs alot of friends. Sometimes just one friend is enough. That doesn't always mean he was a problem with socializing.
     
  19. chebrutta

    chebrutta Enthusiast

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    Sep 4, 2011

    I used to love it when my mom came to have lunch with me in elementary school. And like Joy said, all of us were excited when someone's parent came in for lunch... it was like having a celebrity at the table :)

    I don't think 4th grade is too old for that... but I'd only do it once a month.
     
  20. SCTeachInTX

    SCTeachInTX Fanatic

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    Sep 4, 2011

    We have parents that come in and eat with their kids all the time. I have taught in 5 schools and they have come into every single school. I never knew that eating lunch with a student would even be a question to ponder. I guess it depends on the climate of YOUR school. If it is a norm for parents to eat lunch at the school, then why not.
     

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