I think this may have to be my last year teaching. :(

Discussion in 'General Education' started by DrivingPigeon, Sep 11, 2015.

  1. DrivingPigeon

    DrivingPigeon Phenom

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    Sep 11, 2015

    I just can't handle it. I don't know how any parents can. :( Maybe I'm doing something wrong. Maybe I'm missing something. Here is a day in the life:

    5:00 Wake up, get ready for work
    6:00 Pump (I pump exclusively, 4 times a day)
    6:40 Wake LO up and get ready for daycare
    7:00 Leave the house
    7:35 Get to work
    - 3 out of 5 mornings I have a meeting
    - Three days a week I have a 30 minute prep, two days a week I have a 60 minute prep.
    - I pump during my entire lunch hour, while eating lunch.
    3:45 Work is done, pick LO up from daycare
    4:30 Get home, play with my crabby baby, try to feed her and eat something myself. DH gets home around 5:00.
    6:00 Put LO to bed (we switch off doing this)
    6:30 Pump
    7:00 Laundry, cleaning, check email, crash on the couch
    I'm usually asleep by about 8:30/9:00
    I get up around 2am to pump, and I'm usually up for about 60-90 minutes. This is also when I bag up milk to freeze or take to daycare, switch laundry to the dryer, etc. For some reason I get a huge burst of energy during this time.

    I'm exhausted. I hate going from seeing my LO 12 hours a day for the past 6 months to just 2. I cry about it almost every day. Taking her to daycare breaks my heart.

    I'm so sick of my job already. I spend every single minute of my prep time working my butt off, and I still don't even have my lesson plans even close to being finished for the upcoming week. My team wants to meet during lunch time, so I'm going to facetime them on my iPad while I pump.

    My principal made it a rule that we had to personally call every parent in our class by today to check in and see how things were going. I haven't called one. When am I supposed to do this?!! We have to do running records and PALS assessments on all students by October 1st. I used to do this during recess time, but now that's when I pump. We're not supposed to use instructional time to do assessments. When am I supposed to get this all done?!!

    We just got a nasty email that we're printing too much, and we're going to get our printer taken away. I hate being treated like a naughty child. I'm a professional. Treat me like one.

    I'm just so done, and we've only been in school for 8 days. I used to be the teacher who came in at 7 am, stayed until 7 pm, and came in on weekends. I can't do that anymore. I don't want to do that anymore. I absolutely refuse to spend any time that I could be with my daughter at work, or on work-related tasks. I'm realizing that this is nearly impossible. For the first time in my career I'm working just 40 hours a week, and I'm not able to fulfill the duties of my job. I also dropped off of all committees and extra-duty tasks this year. I don't want to stay at work late, because that would be an entire day that I go without seeing my LO. That's not happening.

    So, how on earth does everyone do it? People keep saying, "It will get easier," but I don't want it to. I don't want it to be easier to see my baby just 2 hours a day. I just want to see her.

    Sorry for not posting forever (I've been lurking), and then coming on and whining. I'm hoping some of you will have advice for me. I can't do this for 172 more days. :(
     
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  3. swansong1

    swansong1 Virtuoso

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    Sep 11, 2015

    I was the mother who could not go back and leave my children in the care of another person. I quit when my first child was born and didn't go back until the third one was in school full time. I stayed home for several years. During that time I worked nights, opened my own daycare, worked at a church school, etc. I did everything I could to bring in some extra money while I stayed home. I just knew I could not work full time and leave my children. I'm not super mom.

    So, I feel your pain.
     
  4. DrivingPigeon

    DrivingPigeon Phenom

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    I think that will be me next year! DH is ok with me staying home after this year. We didn't plan for it financially, so we compromised and said I would work one more year. I just don't know how I'm going to be a good teacher, and a good mommy. My students deserve a good teacher, and my baby deserves a good mommy. I wish it was more manageable to be a teacher and a mommy.
     
  5. otterpop

    otterpop Aficionado

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    Sep 11, 2015

    I don't have a baby, and I'm overwhelmed. I can't imagine keeping up with all of it with a child. I'm already working 7am-7pm between work and home, and spending at least 4 hours per weekend getting stuff done. We've had preps taken away recently for testing, which we'll get back, so it will get easier... but then we have testing again in a few months. It's an endless cycle. I want my life back.

    Wishing you health and happiness.
     
  6. lilia123

    lilia123 Companion

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    Sep 11, 2015

    I can say I definitely know how your feel! I felt the exact same way when I had my first child. I tried to go back to work and felt very overwhelmed and missed my daughter. The pumping also made it more difficult because the time I used before to plan I now had to pump. I don't know what your personal situation is but I left my job about 2 months after returning from maternity leave. I came back the next year when my daughter was a year old and it was much easier. I wish I had some great advice that would help. It's never easy leaving my kids all day but like people are telling you it does get easier.
     
  7. agdamity

    agdamity Fanatic

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    Sep 11, 2015

    I will say, it gets easier when you're not pumping. Like you, I exclusively pumped for both my children. It's very time-consuming. It's also better when they start staying up a little later. My youngest went to bed by 6:00 her entire first year. She got home from daycare at 5:30.

    Hang in there! You will find your stride.
     
  8. FarFromHome

    FarFromHome Connoisseur

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    Sep 11, 2015

    I would stay home with my son if I could. I've also cried a lot over having to leave him. Luckily my husband stays home with him, so he doesn't have to go to daycare. But I can admit that I sometimes feel jealous. I really struggled at my last school because everyone expected me to stay really late, and I had a new baby and was pumping also. I think pumping damaged my relationship with coworkers because I didn't get to hang out with them and get to know them as much (I still wouldn't have changed anything). That's one good thing about my new school. It's a tough school, but no one looks down on you for leaving immediately after contract hours.

    My son goes to bed at 8, and sometimes 9 lately. I won't put him to bed before 8 because I want that time with him.

    I completely sympathize with you. It's so hard leaving your child and I would give anything to get to be home with my son. I love teaching, but it just isn't the same after having a baby.
     
  9. Backroads

    Backroads Aficionado

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    Sep 11, 2015

    Oh, poor dear! I haven't the slightest idea if it gets easier because my daughter was a year before I went back to work. They say teaching is a good mom job, but it's not when you have wee little ones.
     
  10. creativemonster

    creativemonster Comrade

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    Sep 11, 2015

    I can't even slightly imagine how insanely busy you are as I have no children, but I have noticed that every year my district gets just a slight bit more demanding on my non contracted time. It's really not very respectful. They have now said we aren't to go to trainings during our contracted time, these manditory trainings are only offerred evenings and weekends. like your printing limit, weird and unprofessional on their part. (sorry, but it irks me) Your lunch time should be yours, not your department's. It's difficult enough that your time off contract is already called for by pumping needs and other baby related needs. ...I feel for you and I don't think all of it is about being a new mom.
     
  11. scmom

    scmom Enthusiast

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    Sep 12, 2015

    I am a huge advocate of breast feeding and nursed all my children as long as I could. That being said, it may be the straw that is breaking your back. You have given your child a wonderful, healthy start, but if it is draining your time and energy, it may be time to wean. You will still be a good mother - maybe better in some ways because you won't be as exhausted. Pumping takes so darn long and just isn't fun. I would consider gradually weaning to make life easier for yourself.
     
  12. bella84

    bella84 Aficionado

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    Sep 12, 2015

    I agree with this. I also don't have any children of my own, and I always wonder how I would possibly handle it if I did. I can't even imagine how I would make it all work. Teaching is such a demanding job, where we're always being asked to do more and more with less and less. Even without having children to factor in, I'm coming dangerously close to the point of burnout from all of these demands. Props to you for even trying to make it work. I know I would be a mess if I were in your shoes.
     
  13. giraffe326

    giraffe326 Virtuoso

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    Sep 12, 2015

    :hugs:

    I am not teaching this year. School just started Tuesday here, so I'm not sure how much I will miss it. The last year was so tough on me and I had so much anxiety and depression that I knew I needed a break. So far, it has been very nice to leave work at work. My company doesn't even allow us to check our email when we are out of the building. They say that there is someone here to worry about it. (We set an out-of-office and it gets forwarded to someone else.)
     
  14. bella84

    bella84 Aficionado

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    That sounds amazing. Can I ask what field you're now working in? As I mentioned in my most recent post, I'm thinking of getting out of teaching too. Long term, I'd like to go and get a Ph.D. in educational policy, but I'm trying to figure out what else I could do in the meantime besides temp work.
     
  15. Upsadaisy

    Upsadaisy Moderator

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    Sep 12, 2015

    Driving pigeon, I think I know what you would say if you were asked if this situation was good for your health or the health of your baby. I don't know if you can afford to take more time off, and our country doesn't offer a humane alternative for parents of young children. Besides that, I think the teaching profession, itself, has become inhumane and inured to the needs of teachers, in general. You have to do what is right for you, though; what is reasonable for one parent isn't for another. How much should you be giving up for your job? Should you spend your time addressing the needs of other people's children when you feel as though you can't address your own needs or those of your child? If it weren't so difficult to get a teaching job, your answer would probably be quite clear.
     
  16. gr3teacher

    gr3teacher Phenom

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    I understand the feeling. This was the first week of school for us, and I didn't see my daughter from Tuesday morning until last night. That balance will get better once the school year gets going, but it's always frustrating that no matter what, there will probably always be at least one day a week where I don't get to see her.
     
  17. giraffe326

    giraffe326 Virtuoso

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    Sep 12, 2015

    I work for a title company. Basically, I deal with things like deeds, liens, payoffs, etc... I prepare paperwork for closings. It is not a very exciting job, but the environment is great. They treat their employees well. Just yesterday someone declared 'dance party' and everyone got up a started dancing. They are huge on volunteering, so I will actually be tutoring a first grader every week- on the clock. I figure that can help me fill that void somewhat. They actually give awards for top volunteers. Some people do 8 or more hours per week. All on the clock.

    Chicago has a pretty big title compan
    y. I usually have one or two orders with documents from them each day.

    Or, if you want to move over to the better side of Lake Michigan (;)), my company is hiring like crazy. We are about to take on another big client. They have gone from 2000 employees in January to about 2800 now. I'm sure they will still be growing for months after we take on the new client. I don't know how tied to Chicago you are, but the owner of my company owns about 120 companies of varying size. They run orientation every other week and there are 180 spots in each class. I actually had to wait over a month for an open spot in a class.
     
  18. Pashtun

    Pashtun Fanatic

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    Sep 12, 2015

    How does the salary and benefits match up compared to a teacher?
     
  19. ktdclark

    ktdclark Comrade

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    Sep 12, 2015

    I remember having all those feelings too when my now 12 year old was that age--part of the reason we only have one is because of working...my husband's business could not support our family if I wasn't working.

    Your schedule sounds OVERWHELMING and I wish you had more support at school...we used to take each others' classes after recess so pumping moms could pump in peace AND get a wee break at their recess...

    My heart goes out to you. Teaching is exhausting without a baby to care for at home. xoxoxo
     
  20. giraffe326

    giraffe326 Virtuoso

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    I assume that is meant for me.

    My job is hourly with commission. Without working any overtime, I will make about $3000 less than I did teaching. (I used the average commission amount for my position for my calculation.) But overtime is unlimited and doesn't need approval. You actually are required to work overtime during the last week of the month (there is a large increase in business). I could easily earn $5000-10000 more than I did teaching. (My take-home is a little more than it was teaching because my insurance costs are lower and no more union dues.)

    Benefits-
    Insurance is great. I pay $20 a week with very low co-pays and deductibles. WAY better than I've had teaching. Dental is $3.50 a week and vision is $1.50 a week. Dental covers all exams and x-rays, plus $3000 a year. Vision covers new frames every year, new lenses every year, PLUS contacts and computer glasses every year.
    The company provides certain beverages (coffee, cappuccino, teas, hot chocolate, and frozen slushies) and snacks free every day.
    They provide meals pretty often. Especially at the end of the month when you are on mandatory overtime. Probably 3-5 per month, at minimum.
    Paid volunteer time with no limit.
    In your first year you earn 80 hours paid vacation, 40 hours sick time, plus 4 personal days. 7 paid holidays. Vacation and sick time go up every year after that.
    Paid lunches. I work eight hours. I often work through my lunch because I'm earning commission. Sometimes I will run out and grab something and bring it back. Occasionally I will actually take my lunch.
    They pay up to $150 a month towards day care costs.
    They match 401K up to $5000 a year and you are fully vested after four years.


    The atmosphere where I work is laid back. Dress code is casual. No flip-flops, shorts, or sweatpants. Other than that, almost anything neat and clean (no rips) is fair game. We have ping-pong tables, a basketball court, Nerf guns, scooters, etc... to use whenever. On the clock. They threw an end-of-summer party the other day. For hours, most of the company was outside eating free food, getting giveaways, playing games, listening and dancing to the live band, etc...


    My job itself isn't very fun or exciting, but the company tries to make work fun and exciting.
     
  21. Pashtun

    Pashtun Fanatic

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    Sep 12, 2015

    thank you , for taking the time to respond.
     

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