I think I'm going to get in trouble. Do you think I will be able to find another job?

Discussion in 'Secondary Education' started by pinkcupcake90, Feb 23, 2016.

  1. artbrarian

    artbrarian Rookie

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    Feb 26, 2016

    Pink, we're all only human. You aren't the first to have this happen, you won't be the last.
    As far as whether or not you should tell your P, well I'd say you know your P better than we do.

    Personally, I wouldn't. I haven't. I haven't called kids a douchbag, but I've said things in the past I shouldn't and well it never came up.
    We even had a teacher last year that would swear all the time at the students and nothing was ever said about it.
    But the kids never thought it was a big deal I guess or the admin didn't. Either way nothing ever happened.

    Bottom line-you made a general statement. You didn't say "You. You, Johnny, are a douchebag" Yeah you probably shouldn't have. Yeah you did MEAN that kid. But live and learn. You're going to apologize, that's good, again, I'd stay general and keep from being overly apologetic. The last thing you want is for the kids to try and see if they can make you do it again.

    At this point you've probably done whatever you're going to do, but that's my thought.

    As for bridge, I take offense to the classist and borderline racist notion that all troubled students are likely involved in drugs and gangs and must come from the inner city. It's a toxic notion for any educator to have that kind of bias.
    I'm not even going to touch on the other bizarre things you said.
     
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  2. pinkcupcake90

    pinkcupcake90 Companion

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    Feb 26, 2016

    Hi, everybody.

    I'm sorry for the delayed response. It truly has been a hectic week. We have a meeting today about the PARCC and I'm getting super nervous about it. I feel like such a newbie.

    Everything is fine. I apologized to the student and told the principal. He told me not to worry about it because he has called his students much worse. I certainly will do the best I can to respect every student.

    I am sorry for what I said. I'm just not used to people treating me like garbage. On the same token, I'm just really tired. I have an anxiety and OCD disorder, so I only have two hours of solid sleep a night. I'm treating my disorders with some medication, but it kind of leads me to feeling emotional and on-edge. May God forgive me. I'm also struggling with a recent breakup.

    I had another student yesterday say to me, "It's no wonder why your boyfriend left you." What a lovely bunch of kids I have. Lol! I'm definitely attending a job fair tomorrow to see if I can get hired elsewhere. :(

    As always, you are my family. I have realized that, and I am in great appreciation. You guys are the best. I'm keeping you all in my prayers. :) :heart:
     
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  3. Caesar753

    Caesar753 Multitudinous

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    Feb 26, 2016

    It sounds like things will be okay, at least with regard to this incident. I'm glad for that.

    Is it time to discuss a new treatment plan with your doctor? If your meds are making you feel overly emotional, are there different meds you could try?

    Finally, I think that you should stop discussing your personal life with your students. They don't need to know anything about you, especially not that you just went through a break-up. It's one thing to share details about your life with students as you build rapport and whatnot, but these kids are using what you tell them against you. That's not cool. It's time to put a moratorium on any talk of your personal life. Don't give them that ammunition.
     
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  4. a2z

    a2z Maven

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    Feb 26, 2016

    May I suggest you don't share your personal relationship issues with your students. There is no reason that they need to know you and your boyfriend broke up so they can use it as a weapon at a later date.
     
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  5. pinkcupcake90

    pinkcupcake90 Companion

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    Feb 26, 2016

    I didn't share anything with them. Nor do I ever share such information with my students. One child overheard me talking on the phone during my lunch period. :(
     
  6. pinkcupcake90

    pinkcupcake90 Companion

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    Feb 26, 2016


    I didn't share anything with them. Nor do I ever share such information with my students. One child overheard me talking on the phone during my lunch period. :(
     
  7. a2z

    a2z Maven

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    Feb 26, 2016

    Never say anything personal unless you can guarantee privacy. It seems your lunch conversation wasn't in a location where you could guarantee privacy.

    We have problems with teachers talking among one another in the teacher's lounge with the door open. They feel they have privacy, but when students walk by or other teachers walk by and they are "sharing" their horror stories, opinions, or personal lives, the information gets around fast. It is a hard lesson to learn. Some people I know still haven't learned it and get upset when what they feel was "private" ends up being broadcast.
     
  8. pinkcupcake90

    pinkcupcake90 Companion

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    Feb 26, 2016

    No offense, but you assume a lot about my situation without even knowing about it.
     
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  9. a2z

    a2z Maven

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    Feb 26, 2016

    I know from your post you couldn't guarantee privacy. If you could, no student could overhear your conversation.

    I'm not assuming anything. Someone overheard your conversation while on your lunch break. Those were your words. I just shared other examples of how people think they have privacy when they don't.
     
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  10. pinkcupcake90

    pinkcupcake90 Companion

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    Feb 26, 2016

    Okay. I do thank you, but I just deal with these kids that are driving me mental.
     
    Last edited: Feb 26, 2016
  11. Caesar753

    Caesar753 Multitudinous

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    Feb 26, 2016

    The point here is that the students have somehow gotten access to private information about the OP. I think that the OP would be wise to take steps to ensure a little more privacy and confidentiality in the future simply to avoid a repeat of this type of incident. That's not to say that the OP somehow failed or anything--just that it would be a good idea to double-check for little eyes and ears in the vicinity before discussing anything sensitive or private.

    I have been on the receiving end of hurtful comments that were thrown at me directly, and it really doesn't feel good. I get it. Self-protection is a great way to avoid or at least minimize those sorts of things. Keeping personal business away from students is key.
     
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  12. pinkcupcake90

    pinkcupcake90 Companion

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    Feb 26, 2016

    You guys, it's okay. Forgive me, I'm a bit crabby this morning. I know a2z user is trying to help. I do appreciate it. It's just hard. I feel like such a newbie. My mentor says that it'll get easier with time, but it's a dream job that's driving me cray cray at the moment. :D
     
  13. miatorres

    miatorres Comrade

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    Feb 26, 2016

    pinkcupcake90, I just thought that I'd mention that frankly, your phone conversations are none of the students' business, nor are they any of the faculty's business for that matter. When students would make similar out-of-line comments to me, I would simply say, "I don't ask you or your parents about confidential information, so please don't ask me about that again." I would then drop it and continue with the classroom lesson.
     
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  14. miatorres

    miatorres Comrade

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    Feb 26, 2016

     
  15. pinkcupcake90

    pinkcupcake90 Companion

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    Feb 26, 2016


    You're so right. This kid shouldn't have crossed the line. What's hard is trying to control my tongue, especially when they're being such jerks.
     
  16. czacza

    czacza Multitudinous

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    Feb 26, 2016

    Not assuming, but one can always find a private place to have a conversation or postpone the conversation until privacy is assured
     
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  17. catnfiddle

    catnfiddle Moderator

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    Feb 26, 2016

    MANY hugs your way. It sounds like you're going to get through this year. If someone says something like that to you again, my suggestion is to smile with your mouth but not your eyes while saying, "That's an interesting assumption." The icier you can get your voice, the better. Say it often until you sound like a broken record. It's a good deflection / shield, and they won't be able to tell if they get to you or not. Eventually, hopefully, they will give up and find an easier target.

    You're in my thoughts.
     
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  18. pinkcupcake90

    pinkcupcake90 Companion

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    Feb 27, 2016

    Thank you so much, my dear friend. ❤️
     
  19. czacza

    czacza Multitudinous

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    Feb 28, 2016

    :confused:
    Speechless
     
  20. bridgebreaker

    bridgebreaker Rookie

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    Feb 29, 2016

    I
     
    Last edited: Feb 29, 2016

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