Classroom management vs parents issue

Discussion in 'General Education' started by Geologygirl, Nov 30, 2017.

  1. Geologygirl

    Geologygirl Comrade

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    Nov 30, 2017

    I have been struggling with classroom management this year in one class. I started the term put well with assigning consequences when deserved but had parents tell me their kid would never misbehave and that I lied about thier kids misbehavior. I even had one parent tell me I was harrasing them by calling them to let them know when their kid cheated on a test. The pushback from parents led to me assigning less consequences and the kids bad behavior escalating. I plan to up my class management starting tomorrow, but how do you deal with patents who automatically accuse teachers of lieing if their child earns a consequence, or accuse you of harrasment when you call to let them know about a childs misbehavior and consequence which is required by law?
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  3. Caesar753

    Caesar753 Multitudinous

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    Nov 30, 2017

    How supportive is your admin?
     
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  4. AmyMyNamey

    AmyMyNamey Comrade

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    Nov 30, 2017

    And there you have it.

    You put admin between yourself and these parents, and hope they will support you over the parents. If they do, you are respected and valued. If they do not, get out of this district, because it is trash.

    The situation you've described is altogether common, unfortunately. In twenty years, I've had my share of parents accuse me of picking on their baby. Many of those kids are either dead or in prison today, so my warnings always had merit, my judgments were always sound. But there was no way of convincing those parents their child did not walk on water. Such is the nature of the defense mechanism the weakest of parents develop in order to live aside monsters—they enable and absolve, creating sociopaths destined for either a very short life or life in a cage.

    The veteran teachers around here will tell you much the same thing. Admin gets paid well to deal with these situations.
     
  5. Always__Learning

    Always__Learning Companion

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    Nov 30, 2017

    Geologygirl,

    I think there is a balance here. To me that balance means I have to reflect on my own practice and on what is beyond my control. I once had a parent tell me their child's behaviour was because of me and how I taught. In reflection, I could recognize that there was some truth to this. There were some things I could do better or differently. There were also components of this that were really were about the student's perspective of my subject (prior to taking the course) and that the messaging at home and at school were not the same. My questions for you would be things like:
    - Can you identify teachers in your school with really solid classroom management? If you compare yourself to that best practice, are there things you could be doing better? Are you sending a similar/less or more kids to the office than the peers you identify as strong at managing their classroom? How is your stance towards kids? Do you build relationships with your students? How is your tone/ body language when addressing behaviour?
    - In terms of responding to parents, I would recommend focusing on simply asking for support. I've assigned Suzie a detention. She says she isn't going to show up. Can you please reinforce at home that she should come to her detention to tomorrow. I don't need you to do anything at home. I just need your support in getting Suzie back on track and to do that I need her to recognize and follow classroom expectations.
     
  6. Upsadaisy

    Upsadaisy Moderator

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    Dec 1, 2017

    I would probably not waste the effort on phone calls to that parent. A quick note sent home would suffice to ease my own conscience.
     
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  7. czacza

    czacza Multitudinous

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    Dec 1, 2017

    You didn't say what grade but maybe just assign consequences, have kids fill out some behavior form as 'evidence'
     

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