Another Cover Letter

Discussion in 'Job Seekers' started by jw12, Jul 15, 2012.

  1. jw12

    jw12 Rookie

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    Jul 15, 2012

    I've read some really great cover letter examples here, as well as some great critiques/suggestions. I hope you don't mind if I post my letter here as well. I welcome any and all comments and suggestions. Thanks!


    Dear _________________________,

    It is with great interest that I am applying for the teaching position of ______________________ at ________________ High School. As a 2010 graduate of the University of XXXXXX with a Bachelor of Science in Chemistry and Physics, I have a strong grasp on the fundamentals of science. Furthermore, as a 2012 graduate of XXXXXX University with a Master of Education degree, I have had student teaching experience in the 9-12 grade levels.

    In addition to my coursework, I have also had the opportunity to conduct research in both the scientific and educational arenas. During the summer of 2009, I was able to work on a biomedical research project at XXXXXX University with the purpose of helping to determine the role inflammation plays in kidney failure. Also, as part of the requirements for my Master’s degree, I conducted an independent study in order to determine the relationship between the use of virtual science activities and academic achievement.

    Overall, from an early age I have had an interest in the field of science. I always seemed to enjoy and excel in any science activity, such as elementary science fair projects or high school chemistry competitions. Throughout high school, I felt comfortable and excelled in my biology, chemistry, and physics courses, all the while laying the groundwork for my future as a teacher. On a personal note, I was raised in a home in which both of my parents were teachers and have always had a great respect for the teaching profession. I am comfortable in the classroom setting and feel that I have an innate ability to teach others.

    In conclusion, my primary goal as a teacher is to continually increase my knowledge in educational theory and practices relating to the classroom setting. It is my hope to combine my range of experience with my ability to be an enthusiastic and intelligent teacher in order to make a positive contribution to your school. I would welcome an interview and I hope to hear from you at your earliest convenience.

    Sincerely,
     
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  3. Aliceacc

    Aliceacc Multitudinous

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    Jul 15, 2012

    You're going to hate me.

    I would love to meet you-- it sounds as though you really know your science.

    But what in all that tells me that you're a halfway decent teacher?


    ANd this line: "In conclusion, my primary goal as a teacher is to continually increase my knowledge in educational theory and practices relating to the classroom setting." As a mom, I have to say, that's not what I want as the primary goal of my kids' teachers. I want them to already be well versed in those topics. I want their primary goal to be educating my kids, while at the same time nurturing them.
     
  4. Rainbowbird

    Rainbowbird Groupie

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    Jul 15, 2012

    I would put the third paragraph where the second one is, make the second paragraph the third one, and briefly explain your science accomplishments while inserting some passion for teaching young people. I agree that as a mom, I want to hear how you would inspire your students and engage their interest in science while helping them to achieve.

    I know you didn't mean it this way, but your letter suggests that you are into science first and teaching second, and people might get the idea that you are not as committed to teaching.

    Don't get me wrong, I know how hard it is to do these letters over and over, tailoring each one to the job. You begin to go brain dead after awhile! I know I am! Good luck. It sounds like you have fantastic experience and knowledge. You just have to spin it a bit differently. Sorry, I hate to use that word but it's true!
     
  5. jw12

    jw12 Rookie

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    Jul 29, 2012

    Thanks to both of you for your input. I can see how an administrator might read my letter and think that I'm too nuts-and-bolts of teaching, and not as passionate about the individual student. Also, it's hard writing a generally letter. I will probably tailor this to each specific district I send it to. But first, I have to find some job openings! :)

    Thanks again.
     
  6. HistTchr

    HistTchr Habitué

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    Jul 29, 2012

    I had the same thought as I read the letter. Good luck!
     
  7. teach42

    teach42 Comrade

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    Jul 29, 2012

    Your letter talks too much about your education and love of science but nothing in it tells me how you would use this knowledge to educate your students and contribute to the school. For instance, in the second paragraph, you talk about all this research you've done and then just leave it hanging. You need to connect your experiences to your teaching job.
     
  8. TeacherGroupie

    TeacherGroupie Moderator

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    Jul 30, 2012

    Start over.

    A format that seems to work well for many cover letter writers is to begin by focusing on the job: show that you've done your homework as regards the school or district to which you're applying.

    If you're going to mention your research, lead with the educational research (and did it inform your teaching at all? if so, say so).

    Have you got a "lightbulb moment" story? I mean a story from one's teaching experience (in your case, student teaching is fine) in which you make a difference to an individual student. If so, tell it here, and let's see how to weave it into a letter.
     

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