A friendly reminder (and a vent)

Discussion in 'General Education' started by bella84, Sep 9, 2018.

  1. BioAngel

    BioAngel Science Teacher - Grades 3-6

    Joined:
    Oct 11, 2007
    Messages:
    3,642
    Likes Received:
    108

    Sep 9, 2018

    I am so very sorry that you went through this. People tend to be clueless, but we should realize everyone is going through something in their lives.

    A good friend of mine (who I use to work with) had to miss something important because her cat was dying and she had to bring it to the vet. The admins chewed her out for that. They didn't give two hoots that he beloved animal was suffering and needed to be brought to a vet - and she was the only one who was able to do it.

    A few months later, she finds out she is pregnant and overjoyed - they had been trying for a few years and she was past 40 already. About a month or two into her pregnant, she miscarries. Except she has parent-teacher conferences the day her miscarriage starts. She was so scared about missing those conferences that she came in while having a miscarriage and had to sit through 8 hours of conferences - talking up their kid and sharing how she will help their kid become better - while losing her own. She didn't think our admin would be understanding after the death of her cat so she avoided asking to be out.

    Broke my heart that she couldn't take care of herself and her baby during that time :(
     
    bella84 and vickilyn like this.
  2. JimG

    JimG Comrade

    Joined:
    Jul 27, 2017
    Messages:
    275
    Likes Received:
    117

    Sep 9, 2018

    I am so sorry for your loss and for the added insult to injury you experienced. People who haven’t gone through such things truly do not think about the emotional toll it takes, nor about how their (to them) seemingly innocuous words, questions, or actions may be completely devastating.

    After my wife miscarried, people who knew about it would ask her when we would start trying again; people who didn’t know would ask her when she was due. Both were like daggers to the heart. I say this in hopes that, to somewhat echo your sentiment, readers will think more carefully next time before asking any woman about their family planning. If you don’t know what she is going through, you may be better off making small talk about something else.

    Once again, I am so sorry for your loss.
     
    Joyful! and bella84 like this.
  3. teacherintexas

    teacherintexas Maven

    Joined:
    Jul 7, 2005
    Messages:
    5,256
    Likes Received:
    715

    Sep 9, 2018

    I’m sorry for your loss. Hugs for you.
     
  4. TeacherGroupie

    TeacherGroupie Moderator

    Joined:
    May 13, 2005
    Messages:
    29,438
    Likes Received:
    994

    Sep 9, 2018

    My condolences, bella84.

    A reminder of this nature is always timely.
     
  5. MathGuy31

    MathGuy31 Rookie

    Joined:
    Nov 3, 2013
    Messages:
    56
    Likes Received:
    11

    Sep 9, 2018

    Good that your P didn't but really bad that this PE teacher did this. Then that teacher who did this needs some coaching. The PE teacher should never require teachers to do things like this. That was rude of this teacher and not thought out. It's putting people on the spot and not very professional unless specific teachers want to do this.
     
  6. mathmagic

    mathmagic Enthusiast

    Joined:
    Nov 20, 2012
    Messages:
    2,405
    Likes Received:
    1,154

    Sep 9, 2018

    I can't fathom your loss, and hope for nothing but the best in recovering from such a tough time. So very sorry.

    And you're so right. We have to always make sure we think about those unintended effects of what we're doing - even if it's meant completely positively.
     
    MathGuy31 likes this.
  7. rpan

    rpan Cohort

    Joined:
    Mar 19, 2017
    Messages:
    622
    Likes Received:
    450

    Sep 10, 2018

    Your courage is very inspiring Bella. I’m so sorry this has happened to you and I want you to know that I’m thinking of you and I hope things will be better for you.
     
  8. a2z

    a2z Maven

    Joined:
    Sep 16, 2010
    Messages:
    5,594
    Likes Received:
    1,483

    Sep 10, 2018

    I'm so sorry for your loss, Bella.
     

Share This Page

Members Online Now

  1. 3Sons,
  2. MrsC
Total: 332 (members: 6, guests: 270, robots: 56)
test